I'm clueless - what happens when you take a dummy away?

[LondonKiwi123]

DS is 5 months and I've only just started to give him a dummy for naps. He was getting too heavy to rock to sleep (99th percentile!) and I tried settling with no movement in cot/on our bed but there was only lots of crying.

He's a sucky baby so I tried a dummy and it worked brilliantly. Thing is, no one in my family uses one for their kids so I don't really know what you replace a dummy with when you take it away. If you only take it away when they're older (2 years?) do they just then 'know' how to go to sleep without it? If it's younger (6m-1yr?) do you have to go back to rocking/patting etc?

The dummy is saving my back but I sort of have this feeling deep down that maybe it's the wrong direction to go in. I was thinking of introducing the dummy at bedtime too (currently feeding to sleep). And will still do carrier and stroller naps without dummy.

What has been your experience? How does sleep happen once your baby/toddler has been weaned from the dummy?

I wouldn't worry about it for a while yet.

My Child was about 2 and we did the dummy fairy thing. She wasn't allowed it all the time, it was a bedtime/nap time/ very upset only. We always made her take it out when she 'spoke'.

my dc was 3 and a half when we gave up the dummy! We actually forgot it when we were going on holiday and it was pretty tough. She was ratty and wouldnt nap all holiday meaning we were in the room again by 9 missing the entertainment

Dh and i ended up watching bbc i player on the balcolny most nights...not fun!

But there were no dummies so she couldnt asl for it and as she was so knackered from a day at the pool and kids club etc she was fast asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow so when we got home 2 weeks later she was able to go to sleep without it no issues.

So dont worry about it for a while but it can be quite tiring and draining when first removing that dummy

Thanks @fortheloveofcrisps. I plan to offer it for sleeps only. Did your daughter sleep ok after the fairy took her dummy away?

She's 12 now - not sure I remember that much.
There was probably a bit of upset but not much. We had talked about it a lot with her, we did it after a holiday so she knew there was a deadline. I do remember her older sister asking for help to stop sucking her thumb so she could get a 'dummy fairy' gift at the same time. She was about 4 and would coat her thumb in that bitrex nail polish stuff.

We just ditched the dummy at 2 - couple of nights of crying but nothing where I thought I'd made a terrible decision! I think the best thing to do is keep it to naps and night time to start with rather than giving it at anytime during the day, think it makes it easier to quit.

No advice as DD has just turned 3 and has hers for bedtime. Really need to get rid of it, but pregnant, knackered and can't face it yet!

From about 6 months she only ever had it for naps & bedtime, not in the day / out and about, so she would never want it then.

To be honest before the dummy she was an awful sleeper and we were on our knees. Since giving it (and a routine etc) she has been an amazing sleeper.

The advice is to get rid of the dummy between 6and 12months so it doesn't impact speech or teeth, and it's easier the younger they are as they forget. Tbh if i were you I'd just work on a different settling method.

Just keep to what you are doing and keep it for nap time.

My DD1 had a dummy for a while at around the same age. She ditched it herself at around 9 months old

Shortly after that she decided that whilst she definitely didn't want her own dummy (I did try), she DID want the ones other babies were sucking. I soon learned that I had to stick to her like glue at our mother and toddler group or she would crawl up, swipe the dummies out of their mouths an make off with them, leaving the other baby screaming.

I am sure your little one won't pull that stunt!

Add in a comforter of some sort he can also have (one of mine has a soft teddy, the other used a muslin square).

Then, when the dummy eventually goes, they still have that other comforter.

We left ours out for Father Christmas and they got exchanged for a bulging stocking. Seemed to work. He was about 2....

It depends tbh? One of mine just sucked her thumb instead 🤦🏼‍♀️ she had the dummy for bed time until she was quite old because getting my others to give up thumb sucking was more traumatic than her finally dropping needing the dummy.

My twins were just over 3. We talked about the dummy fairy for a few weeks prior to her visit and they chose a special 'big girl' toy to have in return.

I was ready for it to be awful but they went to sleep absolutely fine (just a bit later than usual) and that was that. They never asked again.

They had been only having them for bed time for a few months before that.

I really wouldn't be worrying about that yet. Dummies are great for sleep, so stick with it. You'll have way bigger fish to fry in the next couple of years than worrying about getting rid of the dummy!