Nightmare at bath - hair washing

[doadeer]

My son is 18 months. He has never really loved bath time... Always quite nervy but recently it's got so much worse, he is terrified.

We do a bath every few days as it's not a relaxing affair and I usually end up in with him. We have fun toys and everything you'd expect.

He has thick curly hair (he is mixed British Carribean) and washing his hair is just a nightmare. As his hair is thick, the shampoo takes more than a couple rinses to come out by this time he is hysterical clinging to us in fear 😢

Has anyone got any advice? It's so upsetting

Would he prefer the shower? Mine has lots of hair (straight though rather than curly) and now we're out of the food all over the head stage it just gets a wash once a week at a weekend when there's two of us here to toddler wrangle.

Maybe I can try!

I should have said I think it's water in his face which is the real fear. And being submerged in water in the bath he hates.

I had this with DD. She has thick, long (down to the backs of her knees), curly hair. I found that one of the flexible jugs that moulds around the forehead, so no water goes anywhere near the eyes, really stopped the tears.
The water pours really gently out of it so it's quite relaxing for her also.

Might be worth a shot?

I've never seen that @ActuallyItsEugene do you happen to have a link?

Wow sounds like her hair is beautiful!!

You can buy things like this to shield their eyes.

https://www.oliversbabycare.co.uk/product/munchkin-shampoo-rinser-pink/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIhLeV-ZvS6gIVBLDtCh1JXgojEAQYCCABEgLUofD_BwE

They're fantastic. If you look on amazon you can get different colours and patterns.
I got DDs one from Asda :)

Her hair is lovely now, thank you! Massive pain in the bum when she didn't like having it washed or brushed, but didn't want it cut either

Have you heard of cowashing? I use a cowash for my curly haired toddler then leave in conditioner. Much easier than masses of shampoo and better for Afro hair.

I've bought those jug and visor things to try thank you!

Yes I could condition only... It might be easier to wash out! His hair type is probably a 4

Grrr it did that thing where it said it hasn't posted then duplicated 🙄

I would definitely cowash that beautiful hair! Looks like my son's

I let my DS put Goggles on when I was his hair! He finds it hilarious and stood
Anything going in eyes! I also only wash hair once a week max!

We had this. We got her to hold a small folded towel over her face and "look up!" but it isn't easy. The visor idea may work. We had one but it was sort of floppy and didn't work that well!

Also I've found doing both shampoo and conditioner at the same time lessens the nightmare. Using the shower is good if he will look up. We have had to work up to this but we did get there in the end.

Look at curly girly method for what kind of shampoo to use. I used to scream blue murder (so DM tells me) when my hair was washed. I've been using conditioner type shampoo since lock down began and I would like to say that at the age of sixty it has revolutionised hair washing for me

And my hair looks great, too.

Your sons hair looks lovely and could very well be all the better for using products for curly hair. All the best.

We've got lots of conditioning products designed for afro carribean hair as partner has been growing his in lockdown! I'll try them first but research if they don't agree.

Do you think he will grow out of this bath fear? It's so awful to see

We hang toys on the high wall or ceiling and get DS to look at them/tell me what he can see/make sounds etc and spot them so he is looking up and then no water goes in the eyes.
Works a treat

Oh and we also encourage time to play in the bath with no water.
That way DS has 'positive' associations with the bath and not just 'going in there to get washed' if that makes sense

My daughter is 3 loves a bath but hates her hair being washed... Screams the place down literally, has to have a towel over her face not that, that helps.. The bathroom and myself gets soaking.. Dread washing her hair coz of the fight I know that is coming but has to be done.. After her hair is washed she's fine and happy again and playing.. Hoping it gets easier though

My daughter is 3 loves a bath but hates her hair being washed... Screams the place down literally, has to have a towel over her face not that, that helps.. The bathroom and myself gets soaking.. Dread washing her hair coz of the fight I know that is coming but has to be done.. After her hair is washed she's fine and happy again and playing.. Hoping it gets easier though

DS1 was like this, hated it. DS2 was a revelation as he copes really well. You can tell he doesn't like it but he just sort of wipes his face and is fine! Sometimes if it's part of a game he even thinks it's funny. Introduced them both to hair washes the same.

We managed to help him overcome it but he was older. At that age, you can't explain to them or reason with them, and the shield type things don't work as they don't understand.

My youngest son has always been the same, absolutely terrified of water on his head or face.

We use this for 3 weeks and then do a proper water wash. No screaming and it smells nice and does seem properly clean. Not sure if it's good for Afro hair but the bottle says all hair types? https://www.amazon.co.uk/Zerreau-Towel-Off-Shampoo-Foam/dp/B01FKEJ75E/ref=mpssa116?dchild=1&keywords=no+rinse+shampoo&qid=1594925901&sprefix=no+r&sr=8-6

We tried goggles and a visor and my son point blank refused to wear either. In the end, my DH held a phone directly above his head with a cartoon on it, so he’d have to tip his head right back. I explained several timed that if he kept his head back, water wouldn’t go in his eyes. We only had to use the phone once. As soon as DS understood what he had to do, things have been a lot better, although he needs regular verbal reminder to keep looking up at the ceiling.

Thanks everyone so many ideas. He's so young to explain about lots of these things... Hopefully it will get easier as he gets older!

My son is 3.5 and all of a sudden he seems to have developed a major phobia of having his hair washed! He’s genuinely terrified and screamed and clawed at his face a couple of weeks ago it was horrible ☹️ No advice as such but you’re not on your own xx

My DS was exactly the same when he was younger, i purchased a visor for him and just about managed to wash his hair a couple of times a week although he still protested and got himself worked up but not as much with the visor.
I enrolled him in swimming lessons when he was 4 and they really focus on getting them to put their face in the water, my DS took a hell of a lot longer than the others to achieve this but once he did the hairwashing became a breeze and he'd happily sit there and let the water pour over his face it was like i had a new child!
I know your DS is much younger but something to think about in the future? Or perhaps to take him swimming (when possible of course) and encourage him to see that splashing and having water in your face can be a good thing :)