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Oh god bathtime with all three on my own again....(sorry long and wingey!)

18 replies

happypiglet · 27/09/2007 13:56

Just had call from DH to 'warn' me that he will be late home again. Its only 2pm but already I am dreading tea/ bath/ bed time with my 3 DC (Ds1 3.5, DS2 2, DD 10weeks).
The last 2 nights I have come down in tears from the experience after feeling that I have let all 3 down.
Tuesday I left the DSs on their own in the bath whilst I BF DD in her room so she wouldn't scream- DS2 (encouraged by DS1) drank the bath water and vomited in the bath- casuing DS1 to have screaming fits. So had to abandon DD mid feed and sort the other 2 out. All three were crying at once- I nearly joined them.
Last night decided to make DD wait for her feed. So got her dry etc while DSs had a quick dip and then she watched (and mostly screamed) whilst I got them dry, read story etc. By the time I fed her she was hysterical.....and I rushed the story, cuddles etc with DSs as I couldn't listen to it any longer.
I've thought about leaving DSs downstairs with a DVD while I bath and feed DD but it seems 'wrong'..... Any tips- how did you manage it..??

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
goingfor3 · 27/09/2007 13:57

Don't give them a bath tonight if it will be too much for you, one day without a bath won't harm them.

ConnieDescending · 27/09/2007 13:58

don't bath them all every night

HuwEdwards · 27/09/2007 13:58

god yes, leave bath nights for when DH is about.

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fairydust · 27/09/2007 13:58

get the ds's to play in there room whilse you bath and feed baby then put baby to sleep - then sort the other two out.

gess · 27/09/2007 13:59

I started putting ds3 in the bath with his brothers from about 8 weeks. I made the bath time slightly earlier. Bathed and dressed all 3 (ds3 in and out and dressed in the bathroom whilst the other 2 were still in the bath). Then fed ds3 downstairs whilst the other 2 watched some TV/lazed around (sometimes ds2 would get a story at the same time). DS3 would usually napo/drop off wiith the feed, so bed for him then bed for the other 2.

TinyGang · 27/09/2007 14:01

I don't bath all mine every night. I used to try and it nearly killed me.

Once I admitted it was piling on tons of stress and that they really didn't actually need a bath every night, things were a lot less pushed at bedtime. Don't be so hard on yourself.

peskipixie · 27/09/2007 14:02

give them one bath a week on separate days or do them in the afternoon. stick a video on for older 2 while you sort out baby. are you bf? i feed baby while reading story sometimes, thats a bit more complicated if you ff tho

bedtime routine only works if it calms everyone down, if it makes things more stressful its not worth having one!

nailpolish · 27/09/2007 14:06

oh god i hate bathtime too
really really hate it
thankfully dh does it
but if he cant i either dont bother (just do face hands and teeth )
or i get in the bath with them
they seem to be better behaved if i get in with them cos they think its a treat

Ettenna · 27/09/2007 14:06

Crikey I've only got one and bath time knackers me out!

Why not leave it until a night when DH is about? They're surely not actually dirty and sweaty. Give them a quick wipe with a warm flannel on the face, neck and hands and r-e-l-a-x!

TheMadHouse · 27/09/2007 14:12

we bath our two every other night at the mmoment. God I remember the dreaded feeling if I had to do it on my own.

I am sure that a good wash will suffice.

oooggs · 27/09/2007 14:17

DH works shift so I am on my own everyother week during tea/bath/bed (2.30pm - midnight)
ds1 is 3.7 and dts are 6mths, it is a juggle but they are all in bed & asleep by 7.20pm. I can't leave the bath for a week so stick ds1 in bath then dt1 goes in comes out gets dried dressed and put on landing then its dt2's turn. A bit like a sheep dip then ds1 watches the end of bedtime hour which gives me 40 mins to feed, bed & settle twins. Then at 7pm ds1 to his bed story then sleep. - But I will add that bathroom, lounge & both their bedrooms are on the same level so I can hear ds1 watching the tv.

PetitFilou1 · 27/09/2007 14:24

Oh fgs of course it is ok to put the dss downstairs with a DVD while you feed and bath dd

It is called survival! Give yourself a break.

Hamandcheese · 27/09/2007 20:10

I do this on my own about half the nights, ages when I started were 4.2, 2.1 and 8 wks. Even with a year of bedtime for three under my belt I still think it's hard, but definitely managable.

This is my typical arrangement: leave DS1 and 2 in front of video while I change DS3 for bed (he rarely gets a bath). leave DS3 while I bring the elder two up (the good alternative which works sometimes is that I put on an episode of something and tell them to come up when it's finished - and sometimes they do).

Feed DS3 (BF) in bathroom while 1 and 2 fight and pour water down the side of the bath (or alternatively DS1 teaches DS2 the alphabet using foam letters).

Put DS3 in bed, get DS2 out - brush teeth, PJs, story (often in the bathroom while DS1 was younger, now on the landing), he goes to bed.

Get DS1 out, teeth, story, cuddle, bed.

sometimes I do #1 & #2 at the same time as each other and they share the story, but that tends to get more fraught. Sometimes I do #2 & #3 at the same time (feed #3 while #2 gets a story), but #3 doesn't settle for his feed.

when DS3 was younger, I'd often save feeding him for last - a battery baby rocking chair was a godsend.

When I'm feeling particularly tired I pay a local teenager to come and help - the elder two love that. It's a fiver well spent - costs the same and better for my health than the bottle of wine afterwards.

happypiglet · 28/09/2007 12:57

thanks for the tips and support! Last night went OK- well at least I avoided yelling at them- although dd still screamed the place down!! DH home tonight hurrah!!

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Amethyst8 · 28/09/2007 20:11

What a fantastic thread. I did bathe my two 4.6 and 1 every night without fail and it can be - not always - a nightmare. Is getting better now but now feel much less guilty about maybe only bathing every other night instead of every night . Once read of someone who referred to teatime/bathtime/bedtime as "Hell Hour".

BitTiredNow · 28/09/2007 20:19

Hi HP - this could be me - I have exactly the same age gap, and sexes, but am 5 months further on. Firstly, it does get easier. Second, repeat after me 'CBeebies is a life saver - the only reason our parents generation are snotty about it is coz they didn't have it!'.I am on my own and this is how I do it: In the early days, I bathed DD in the morning with the others 'helping'. Then I gave her her bedtime bottle while the boys were having their tea, and put her up while they were in the bath - she cried a bit at the start, but now she is a very good self settler. now, as she is more contented with food etc I can bath her, put the boys in, and then give her her milk feed in the bath room. I have also read her a story which they listen to while they are in the bath. But the last couple of days I have done them all in turn, which they love - a bit on one on one time for all. Hang in there - it will get easier/.

haychee · 28/09/2007 20:27

I used to struggle like you all have said until they reached a stage where they didnt need as many baths.
I mean, they could do with one some nights but they dont need that routine anymore. Sometimes they will have a quick shower in the morning, one one morning one another. Is far quicker and easier.
I remember the back ache particularly when washing their hair and or leaning over to support baby. I hated it. Dh has probobly done 5 baths since they were born 7 years ago!
It was essential they had that bath for a long time at bedtimes, i thought i would be doing it forever! But it has passed now, there is light at the end of the tunnel.
They are watching tv right now, dd2 still in school uniform (is 4) dd1 (7) in her dance clothes from earlier. Both are minging but they can have a bath in the morning while i get on with some housework (which means of course, mn)

jamila169 · 28/09/2007 22:38

Ain't it fun with 3 When dd was tiny she didn't get a bath until she was about 12 weeks cos her skin was very dry and was easier to deal with by strip washing, so I would put DS 1(6 at the time) and DS2(2 at the time in together , sit on the toilet seat and feed her while they rioted then herd them all onto our bed for drying - nowadays ds2 and dd get in together while ds1 watches TV then he gets in after moaning about having a bone in his leg etc while I dry the others . when #4 arrives i'll probably do much the same .I'm glad that even though DH works nights, he doesn't leave until 8.30 so does share bath duties and is quite willing to accomodate as many as can squeeze in when he's in the bath as well! It's a good job as my SPD is getting too bad to allow me to get down at the side of the bath with any certainty of being able to get back up again!
Lisa X

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