Is second child worse than the first?

[Felicityfi16]

Hi all, I’m just interested as everyone has always said to me that my first child will be the easy one and the second will be a little monster! Was this true in your case or are people just following the crowd and saying this?

Hoovered around it obviously. Hovering would be really pointless

DS2 is 22 months and so far easier.

I think it's totally random. Birth order has nothing to do with it - some children have challenging stages and this is mainly to do with how they clash with your personality more than anything else.

It's also true that you are not the same person second time around. Experience and expectation.I think my second probably was a more high maintenance baby but I was much better equipped for this - I had no experience before. Second child much more chilled & confident than the first but I think probably because the first child has cared for him so deeply & been a huge part of his development.

Second was a dream. Everyone asked after baby was born how is it to have 2 kids under 2 - the newborn was a dream and the toddler was a nightmare! Now, older, 2nd is still easy going.

In my case second child was infinitely more enjoyable. He didn't sleep great but apart from that the feeding/temperament/health/behaviour etc just everything he sales though. My first slept and ate amazingly but is the biggest diva that could be, everything o do with first is unfortunately quite unpredictable.

My second was far FAR easier than the 1st. An absolute dream of a baby.

From observing others I always thought the second was the easy one, third the challenging one, fourth a dream (for anyone brave enough to keep going that far).

I'm a few months in with DC2 and I think she's slightly more difficult than DC1 but I was better at handling it as more experienced? Really hard to know though!

I always heard the other way around! Because you're more stressed out with your first and it inevitably rubs off. Dc2 just tags along

I'd try not to draw lines. My experience of three has been that they all have their ups and downs. No 2 is by far the most consistent at boundary pushing, but is also an absolute charmer. No one was calm and had one tantrum before 3 but has developed into a far moodier 6 year ols. The baby is delightful but who knows with him...

I love how everyone’s answers and experiences are different. I have a 10 month old DD and I’m sooo broody at the moment. I’ll wait for a little bit before the next one first though.
DD was a dream and slept through from 3 months but got to 6 months and had a couple of feeds in the night but went down pretty much straight away and at 9 months well ... she was waking every 1-2 hours for 3 weeks. This was so hard for me as she was an amazing sleeper as a new born. She’s now sleeping through again or just having 1 feed, fingers crossed it stays that way! I’d have another now if I knew they were as well behaved as DD1 😂

I thought my first was relatively easy until he hit 2 years and 3 months. I also thought he was easy until the 2nd arrived. The second one is so easy in comparison. Can't believe it.

@Felicityfi16 do it sooner rather than later. I thought my boy was relatively easy until he hit the terrible twos.

I wonder if attitdue to child2 is affected by whether it is the desired sex or not - most people want one of each. If the second is a disappointment then they may sense this.
I don't mean people are unpleasant to their child but just that there could be an unconscious difference in behaviour.

I don't think most people want one of each! I think most people don't care. I always wanted two the same, because I was so close to my sister and I feel like a set of brothers/sisters close in age are often very close and I think that's nice.

Hahaha I laugh because yes. It is accurate in my experience. Ds1 - a little treasure. You could take him anywhere. Very sweet, gentle, laid back and obedient. He would hold your hand and walk nicely down the street from age 2. Nearly 7 years pass...Ds2 comes along, and he is a complete and utter tyrant. He rules our whole house with an iron fist, and a strong will to match. Highly strung - "spirited" you might say. Will not walk holding hands. He will scream, he will drop to the floor and lay there. Don't even try to pick him up. And then he will run. I'm too old for it. But as much as he is my little hell raiser, I adore him. He's hilarious.

@TheMostHappy we have a problem with our kid though. He's almost 2. 5 and refuses to let go of hand and run ahead in safe places etc. Drives me mad, and he's a horror in the house, you wouldn't know if you saw him out and about. 😂

Yes. 100%. She’s like the Duracel bunny x

It's true but you'll love them despite of/for it. My second is far 'harder' than my first but has a cracking SOH which makes up for it in bucket loads. Also, once out of the hard nappies, broken nights and endless teething bit - having 2 is actually easier. X

My first two were both very similar in personality- both quite easy going and chilled out.

6 months into the second .. much more content, easier so far !

I don't think the second child will behave better or worse. It's just way more than double the work having two. When people say having 3 is no different to having two it's because having two is so hard! It does get easier but up until the youngest is 2-3 it's really difficult trying to juggle everything.

Goodness, I hope not! DS was NOT an easy baby at all, and he’s a loveable but seriously strong willed toddler. I really think I’m owed a child out baby with No II. I’ve done my time 😆

My first my DS has been harder than my second my DD but they both have they're good days and bad days to be fair.

My DD eats and sleeps better than my DS does. She seems more content than my DS at times.
But then with my DS he's at that age where he will happily sit still or be kept occupied and my DD is at that age where she is into everything at 16 months old which is normal I suppose and my DS at 3 years old.