Toughest Thing About Being A Parent?

[BrandyandBabycham]

Hard to choose one! DD11 has attachment disorder, sensory issues & possibly autistic traits. If I had to choose the hardest thing I think it would be that so often a situation turns into an argument when it really doesn’t need to. DD could debate for The United Nations & it’s incredibly draining. I find myself thinking “ Oh for God’s Sake” several times a day!

Lack of time to yourself. Always being the bottom of the priority list

The fact that’s it’s 24 hours a day 7 days a week and you never really switch off ever!

I now really really savour a quiet cup of coffee during nap times so I guess it makes you appreciate those little things!

The relationship with the other parent.

Trying not to make sarcastic comments all the time... But I do have teenage boys to contend with!

The relentlessness of everything!

Definitely the relentlessness, there is no holiday from being a parent.

Agree the relentlessness - and the constant worry.

Worrying all the time.

Not being able to up and go some where ever without a second thought & a phone call in peace!!

Being 'typecast' by society into the mother figure, but inside I'm screaming that the whole thing is oppressive to my human nature. I want to be free.

Lack of sleep. I’m in the young children & baby stage. I’m bloody knackered!

I second (or third, or fourth) the relentlessness. We never, ever, turn off. Even if they're with someone else, or asleep... At least 25% my brain is still in parent mode.

When they become adults and you have to support them during difficult times (relationship break ups)..
Hard to see young dc upset, just as bad an adult dc..
In my very recent experience sadly..

Having to be "on" at all times with DC - I find this EXHAUSTING, much more so than actual lack of sleep, and I have two non sleepers.

I kind of thought there would be moments where you could just relax and enjoy DC's company but I am yet to find this, or they are few and far between. I always have to be thinking OK - when do they next need feeding, does everyone have enough sun cream on, am I modelling/encouraging appropriate behaviour, am I providing enough stimulating activity in order that they don't go completely off the rails bored but at the same time not occupying them too much or overly relying on things (screens) that will destroy their capacity to entertain themselves.

It probably doesn't help that DC1 has ADHD so needs so much more careful handling in terms of regular sleep/mealtimes/adherence to boundaries and much more focused attention in terms of his behaviour and occupying him than most children.

But I don't believe that issues like ADHD are completely rare, everyone seems to have something and that must go for DC as well.

Got to be the restlessness. Never being able to just do what you want.

That I feel like I've lost myself and that my focus is them and worrying if I'm a good enough parent and being jealous of my childless friends.

No time with partner because 2yo won't sleep until really late then up again and again. Moved nap time to earlier. Cut out a nap. Gave extra nap. Moved bedtime later and earlier. Make sure she is active during day. Nothing works. Any suggestions?

Being woken up every morning.

The guilt...

When they grow up and leave home. You still love them the same, but you don’t always know where they are, and have to let them make their own decisions.

Lack of sleep. If I could get a solid, gaurenteed 8/9 hours a night. This parenting lark would be a walk in the park.

Having the answers to deal with MH issues for my eldest DD - realising I’m a carer rather than a mum to my youngest DD (Chronic Illness). Suicide attempts is the hardest most painful heart breaking thing I’ve had to and am dealing with - all with NO support from any professional. Scared that one day I won’t be enough to keep her here

When they are young adults and you can't fix their problems for them as you could when they were small. It's hard.

@KTyoupigeon yes, I hear you