Parents holding newborn

[danib08]

I'd love to hear (no judgement) what other lock down new mums have done regarding letting their family hold their babies.

I am a first time mum to an 11 week old, you can imagine how painful it has been to have been robbed of the usual new baby experience. It has been a daily battle not to spiral into a depression. I am desperate to share my proudest achievement.

Please be kind.

My baby was 5 month when we went into lockdown and my parents didn't hold her from then until a week or two ago. However if I had a newborn I would have asked them to self isolate for 2 weeks before my due date and let them hold the baby. My parents are early 50s and very healthy though, might think differently if there were any underlying conditions.

Mine wore masks and gloves :)

I have an 11 week old too, my mum held her as a total newborn as she moved in with us to help (isolated beforehand) then my dad met/held about a month ago ( again he hadn’t been out since beginning of lockdown).

I agree this has been a tough time to have a baby- do what is right for you and your family

I have let them hold the baby with masks and washed hands. No kisses.

My parents are coming over from ireland in august. I am pregnant and have an 18 month old. They have said when they come in from the airport they will go straight upstairs, shower, change, and then hug my daughter. When my newborn comes they will do the same. Usually for my inlaws (who arent flying) I would say they wash their hands thoroughly and I would say no kisses with the newborn.

I know how you feel OP, I am due in just over a week and I know it will be agonising either way

I will be miserable if I don't let my parents and grandparents hold the baby and I will be anxious if I do!

It's such a special time that you will never get back and I am so angry at coronavirus for ruining this! Ive found it to be months and months of anxiety and uncertainty which still continues.

I have to be honest I am leaning towards letting them hold the baby perhaps with a mask, I think the situation has improved so much and the risk so small that overall I am leaning that way, however there is still that horrible worry of the worst. I think I will have to wait and see how I feel.

Sending you lots of love and hoping this all goes away soon.

There is actually very little risk of a baby getting it. I am more concerned with me getting it while pregnant which may result in a c section early. There has been the odd scary story of a baby getting it, but a baby can pick up a variety of illnesses from those who come to visit normally anyway. I am trying to keep logical about it but it is hard.

I understand how you feel, I am in the same situation with my 12 week old as a first time mum. My mum is desperate to hold my baby and I'm seriously debating what to do now...

I've slightly lost track of the rules now but I think it would be 'allowed' now, wouldn't it? As long as it's just your two households mixing? Or if not now then from 4 July?

I've also had a new baby during lockdown and it's been hard. Well done to everyone who has had to cope with it! My parents haven't held the baby since she was a couple of weeks old (shortly before lockdown) but I'll be going to stay with them next month and I can't wait.

I had mine at the start of lockdown. Hes 13 weeks old now. My inlaws are coming to visit this afternoon, who have been careful about following lockdown rules. Ill let them hold him if they want too.

I still don’t know what to do about this. I was going to see if MIL wanted to hold DD as I feel it is probably safer now than in a few weeks. But DD just had her jabs and we saw friends who work in shop and hospital respectively as well. Worry about risk to MIL and FIL who is shielding. They do have contact with their other grandchildren though so I’m not sure they would see it as a risk. But I do.

I’m not too concerned with risk to us although the tiny risk of anything happening to my baby is unbearable. But the guilt of passing anything on.

I agree with the PP who said anxious if I do and miserable if I don’t. I think about this way too much and it clouds the time I spend with in laws as I feel bad they aren’t getting to hold her when she is small!

It’s still officially not allowed though.

Ds2 was born exactly 1 week before lockdown. MIL and FIL held him the day we returned from hospital and then no one has since. He’s 15 weeks old on Monday it’s nearly killed me! He is not a tiny newborn at all now and that is something none of my family will ever get back! Have arranged to see ILs this weekend and my dad is coming to stay next weekend (lives 5 hours away). All have followed lockdown precautions to the letter. I’ll be insisting on hand washing, no kisses/ blowing raspberries etc in his face and limiting how long they hold him for but will be letting them. I figure it’s safer now than in a few weeks when more people have been in their houses.

My mum self-isolated two weeks before I was due, then came to visit and held the baby. The chances of catching it are minimal and we were all fine. I wasn’t going to let coronavirus ruin this special time!