Stopping breastfeeding early :(

[Cornberry]

Hi, I am looking for some tips, advice and frankly some support. I gave birth to my second child eight weeks ago. I have multiple sclerosis and I knew it wasn’t going to be easy but since he has been born I have been suffering dramatically with insomnia due to hunger. Essentially I don’t digest properly due to the MS, and my body will not sleep until it’s completely full and it takes hours to get food down and has stopped me sleeping sometimes entire nights. After many frantic calls to uninterested doctors who talked of sending me to psychiatrists, eventually they found that I have an additional condition called pancreatic insufficiency which means that I do not absorb nutrients very well, something I knew but had been unable to get a diagnosis for. Throughout my pregnancy I had to wake up and eat in the middle of the night every night because the hunger would keep me awake and if I ignored it give me crazy anxiety. But now with the breast-feeding it’s become epic. And it appears my body cannot keep up with the demands. Due to my conditions I simply cannot getting enough calories and it’s really causing huge problems with sleep deprivation and endless anxiety attacks which I ascribe to my body being malnourished. It is with a very heavy heart and after doctors' advice that I have decided I have to give up breast-feeding much much earlier than I wanted to. I have been exclusively breast-feeding until last week when we introduced some formula overnight so I could try and catch up on some sleep. I am hoping to drop to one or two feeds a day to maintain the breast-feeding even minimally, but my heart is broken. My body unfortunately is also broken as I never sleep more than an hour and a half at a time, I can't seem to even nap in the day due to stomach issues, and my husband has been living on the sofa with the cot so he can feed baby at night, because even when baby is sleeping I am still usually awake choking food down and then having diarrhoea (also related to my condition). With a four-year-old child this has been very very challenging and I feel I have no choice but to stop breast-feeding. I feel so guilty about it but I was hoping for some advice on the best way to do it and how to keep at least one feed a day. I have spoken to the local Breastfeeding advisor, but advice from and experiences from other moms would be great too. I have already noticed that my son will happily take the bottle from my husband but from me he fusses and just wants the breast which is making this harder. Many thanks

bump!

OP, firstly I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time. Please don't feel guilty...you've done remarkably well under the circumstances, and 8 weeks of breastmilk will be a fantastic start for your baby. Plus, it sounds like you'd like to do some combi-feeding, which works very well for many women. The best thing to do as you start to reduce the breastfeeds, is to drop one at a time,a giving a few days each time before dropping the next, if you can manage it. This will allow your supply to adjust without making your breasts engorged. It will also allow you to keep control of your milk supply, so that you can ultimately keep as many breast feeds as you'd like. Your baby will thrive on formula and some breastmilk too if that is what you'd like. As for taking bottles, once your baby gets more used to taking them from your partner, he should happily start taking them from you too. You sound like a wonderful mother. Your health is very important and you must do what will make the situation tolerable for you. Keeping up one or two breastfeeds a day will still mean you keep your lovely BF relationship and you son will continue to benefit from the breast milk and also from a less exhausted mother, so stop the guilt! You are doing wonderfully and will continue to do so xx

I’m sorry I can’t help much with breast feeding advice but with regards to your pancreatic insufficiency have they tried you on creon or a bile salt medication as if not these could help massively with absorption and the loose stool. Apologies if you are already on these just thought it was worth a mention. Good luck

needmoremummyjuice they have just started me on croon and it's not doing enough sadly

something snappy thanks for the kind words x

I had to stop breastfeeding much earlier than I wanted to as I need regular breast MRIs. I was really upset about it at the time, cried buckets and felt so angry with my body that the choice was being taken out of my hands as I loved bf. But nearly a year on I can barely remember it! I think I cut out one feed every 5ish days. I did get mastitis so watch out for that, and my son was crap at taking a bottle but he got there in the end (made the milk warmer than you'd think to, and heated up the teat a bit). When I did my last feed my husband took some lovely pictures of it and I have those to look back on

Bless you OP I work with pancreatic/liver issues it must be so draining alongside a newborn! Please go back to your specialist if it is not working there are options to increase dose with both the meal and snack dosage and other medication options to get your symptoms more manageable.

Don't feel bad about stopping or cutting down. 8 weeks is an amazing achievement with so many other issues going on, and still longer than many manage it for. If you could sustain just one feed a day then baby will still be getting some antibodies etc.
By giving your body a bit of a rest you will be benefiting both children. There is no point breastfeeding at all cost and being too exhausted to enjoy your family. You can always increase the feeds again in the future if you can stabilise the issues with your digestion.

OP, I’m sorry you’re so unwell, that sounds incredibly tough with a newborn and a 4 year old.

I never tried mixed feeding (my DMum or DH could give DD a bottle, but I never really bothered to push that when she was with me), but many many women do combination feeding. Your baby will get used to it, but I imagine it’ll take a while. During that time, please please please don’t feel guilty. Your baby has had the collostrum and the skin-to-skin contact, that’s great. Your child will grow up healthy on formula milk, as many babies do, please don’t push your health to breaking point over this.

Thanks. I just feel heartbroken and like there has to be a way...