how do you feel about your toddler

[cheeseonbakedbeans]

Hello
looking for someone who would kindly share their experience.
I am a mother to a gorgeous 3 year old little girl and have been struggling with something since almost the beginning... A feeling that I should love her mother, or rather, that other parents feel overwhelming love for their children all the time. I had PND and got some help, and I feel ok in myself now, but sometimes when I think about my little girl whilst she is in preschool for example, I don't feel very much.. like on an every day kinda life, things feel a bit... meh.
Sorry for the long and slightly unclear post. Hopefully some discussions will clarify further what I'm trying to put into words!

love her more, not love her mother :)

I think that's pretty normal? It comes and goes for me. Some days my DH takes her out and i miss her like a limb, and other days I'm very happy for the time off.

Do you enjoy spending time with her? Feel pride in her accomplishments? Concern for her when things aren't going well?

Thanks for the reply SomeneElse.
I do feel proud and definitely enjoy time with her. I'm ok with enjoying my time off, it's more a sense of something should feel more - like some mums seem to just get filled with love when thinking about their children?

I love mine so much. But too much time with him I feel like I might actually lose my mind. He's full on, also creative, funny, interesting, joyful, curious, kind, cheeky, but I do need a break. Lockdown has been hard. I will be happy when he has more to keep him occupied and he's not trashing the house all the time.

I hate the drudgery of parenthood, I love My kids and enjoy their personalities. Some days I feel like it's all drudgery, though. It's been hard recently. They need friends, so do I! And human contact etc.

How do you feel when you. Pick her up from preschool ? Do you listen to her stories and chat? I have 20 something's and had pnd with. My eldest and it. Takes a lot away from you but you can work on your bond and not being "sad" she is away is fine you know she is having a nice time .

Some parents are quite emotional when taking about their children it almost over flows but I think it's ok not to be like that.

Thanks everyone. I think I'm thinking about the early days and how overwhelming the love for her was, but then PND kicked in, she grew up, and I sometimes worry I am still catching up with something. Like I'll be sitting working whilst she's not here and think about her and feel just a bit... medium. Like she's lovely, and so amazing but it doesn't feel overwhelming. Just wanted to know if others also feel a bit meh sometimes

Yes meh although it sounds terrible is actually ok I think day to day is different from the bigger picture.