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Parenting

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Original poster

Newborn not settling

23 replies

Hodge85 · 22/06/2020 23:18

Hi,

I've just fed my newborn over 90ml of Aptamil and burped him however when I go to lie him down he screams and kicks his legs. He also looks like he wants more food but when I try, he's not interested. Any help would be great.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

zoezoeok89 · 22/06/2020 23:53

Could be anything! Sometimes babies don’t want to go down, could be reflux, could be wind. Anything else happening?

LatteLover12 · 22/06/2020 23:56

Sometimes they just want you. Cuddle in & try to rest together rather than putting him down.

Google the fourth trimester.

It's so hard when they're new but it does get easier, I promise.

luckymagnoliatree · 23/06/2020 00:04

Aw bless him, sounds like he might have some trapped wind or a tummy ache, when my boys were younger they used to thrash their legs a lot and scream out if they had a tummy ache. Maybe a gentle tummy rub will help? Try some circular motions on his tummy using your flat palm in a clockwise direction. More prolonged winding to see if he needs to get more of a burp up.

I hope he has settled for you now/ settles soon.

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mineofuselessinformation · 23/06/2020 00:11

Cuddle him to your body, arms up over your shoulders, legs down, so he's stretched out. Then, try to burp him gently.
See if it helps.

MyEnormousTurnip · 23/06/2020 00:14

He probably just wants to be held. It’s hard but it does get better.

Grandmi · 23/06/2020 00:17

Newborn babies need lots of cuddles and reassurance. Give baby 6 weeks and it will get easier.X

roxfox · 23/06/2020 00:26

Might not want to lay down? Lots of cuddles. Take advantage of lockdown, if this is your first maybe you don't have much you have to do? Massive assumption I know but thats what I did anyway and we made it through the initial newborn phase with relative ease.

I literally just chilled out with our baby and had lots of skin to skin and cuddling time. She had pretty bad reflux and it really helped us get through. Turned out it was a dairy problem...: they say it calms down once there tummy adjusts at 3 months but I couldn't bare it!

Good luck op, you'll get through it. My little one shocked me today at 4 months and cried when I picked her UP, first time she has done that!! My heart broke a bit but I put her back down and let her finish gazing at the ceiling until she beckoned me. Anyway what I'm saying is there was a time I couldn't be half a foot a way from her and now she's lil miss independent!xx

Aquamarine1029 · 23/06/2020 00:29

He doesn't want to be laid down alone. He needs you to hold him.

Wheresthebiffer2 · 23/06/2020 00:43

make sure he's burped well.

edin16 · 23/06/2020 00:57

Have you got a wrap sling you can put them in and have a gentle bounce around?

I'm currently up feeding my 3 week old so have been trying lots of different things the last couple of weeks and I know your pain!

There was one day in particular where what you describe rings true, I'd fed him and fed him and he was still screaming like he was hungry so I thought maybe he wasn't getting enough from me and I gave him some Aptamil which he wouldn't take. He carried on for a while, by which point I was crying and upset. My partner took him for a bit then when I had calmed down I took him back and he literally fell asleep in seconds. Sometimes they can sense your stress.
And sometimes there's nothing you can do but ride it out!

Time2change2 · 23/06/2020 01:00

Babies are programmed to need to be near a caregiver. They want to be cuddled and made to feel safe all the time because otherwise they wouldn’t survive! Totally normal behaviour. The first 3 months is a complete battle between holding them and getting enough sleep and rest yourself. It’s so hard but it does change at 13 weeks. I counted down to that milestone with all of mine as it was so hard. Keep cuddling and trying to settle and getting snippets of sleep and rest where you can!

edin16 · 23/06/2020 01:00

Also I've found with my baby that when I put them down I have to put one hand over their legs and one on their chest and give them a pat or rock for a few minutes.

Original poster

Hodge85 · 23/06/2020 01:03

He was warm so I've stripped him down and we've had skin on skin where he was showing classic cluster feeding signs so I let him feed. He fell asleep then he did an almighty nappy fill so we changed him and he just screamed the place down. He keeps chewing his hand as though he's hungry, he's just screaming

OP posts:

Aquamarine1029 · 23/06/2020 01:06

Sometimes they can sense your stress.

Not sometimes, all the time. Babies are emotional sponges.

edin16 · 23/06/2020 01:09

If you need to, pop him down, leave the room and go and take a breather for a few minutes and get yourself composed.

GrumpyHoonMain · 23/06/2020 01:13

Babies get hungry after poos. Try feeding him again. Would also suggest feeding 20ml at a time (paced feeding) to make sure he’s not gorging himself silly - 90ml seems like a lot in one go.

LatteLover12 · 23/06/2020 05:10

How are things now @Hodge85 ? I hope you've managed to get some sleep.

cookiesaurus · 23/06/2020 05:33

Didn't want to read and run.
I've totally been in your position and it feels absolutely terrible. If he's newborn, he will go through times like this where nothing you do helps. You will get through it though.

I was hugely emotional for the first two weeks after giving birth which I found really difficult as that is not my natural disposition.

It does get easier although that doesn't help you in the here and now. Hope you managed to get some sleep x

Original poster

Hodge85 · 23/06/2020 06:34

Thanks all for your help! We were in despair last night. Eventually he settled down, my husband rocked him and then we played a white noise video and it worked and we managed a few hours sleep.

We've woken up this morning but the same thing happening so we've fed and burped him and when we're putting him down in his crib, flat on his back, he gets the hiccups which starts him off crying. If we prop him up elsewhere he's as good as gold. We've left him propped up for like 20 minutes or so and then moved him and it's still happening. Is this a reflux issue?

OP posts:

MyEnormousTurnip · 23/06/2020 06:47

Someone with more knowledge will answer you more confidently and have some advice but yes it does sound like reflux. What a shame for all of you.

Those long nights of no sleep are awful. But there’s always someone on Mumsnet to respond and help you.

Well done for finding a solution of sorts.

LatteLover12 · 23/06/2020 06:53

Sounds like he's uncomfortable after his feeds.

You could try raising to top legs of his cot up a little so it's on an angle to help him sleep?

Also, infacol or gripe water from the chemist might help.

Talk to your health visitor though, that's what she's there for.

Lockdownseperation · 23/06/2020 07:20

Sounds to me like a classic new baby. Definitely google 4 trimester, they just need cuddles all the time.

Aria2015 · 23/06/2020 08:26

Try holding him upright for 15-20 minutes after a feed before putting him down. My lo had reflux and that helped with him. He did grow out of it eventually. Good luck!

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