Routines

[RC1985]

Hello All

During this lockdown it’s been easy to stick to a routine (obviously we have the odd bad day). However on the odd occasion we have ventured out to see people with lockdown being eased slightly, it completely wrecks the routine and she sleeps less then her night sleep isn’t as good.
We want to start doing more with her but worried we won’t be able to do it loads or she’ll end up with problems. Is this just a things as babies aren’t sleeping where they normally would sleep, if this happens to you, do you just live life and not worry about it? Am I worrying about nothing?
She’s 3 months btw.

Ive been getting around this by tailoring what I do to either in the morning, so if sleep is disrupted my son can 'catch up' during the rest of the day. Or doing things that wont effect sleep, ie - pushing him around in a pram where he'll sleep regardless of what im doing. (Hes 11 weeks old).

I do worry about this for when he goes to nursery though at 6 months

I think some babies are totally flexible (dd1) and can sleep anywhere, others needs a much more rigid routine (dd2). As a family you just need to decide what suits you in terms of whether/how often you are willing to sacrifice a good sleep so that you can do stuff out of the house. For us, we have to balance the needs of both children as dd2 is a nightmare if she doesn't get enough sleep during the day, but it's not fair on dd1 to never get to go out. We have worked on trying to get dd2 happier napping in her pram, so do a pram nap at least once per day and also take my bf cushion if we are going to family as she will normally have at least one decent nap on there a day.

This is why I never did much of a routine. I didn’t understand how people stuck to them unless they stayed at home all day.

Is this your first child OP?

Part of the steep learning curve when becoming a parent is a true understanding that you life had to bend to the needs of your child.

Yes, you can still go out and about with a baby. But you have to give thought to baby's routine in order to fit that in.

If you usually have a pram/car seat nap - use that nap time to go out where you need to. If baby sleeps indoor, then you time when you go out for when baby wakes up.

@Letsallscreamatthesistene thanks for sharing your advice. If I go to the park and meet someone I have to drive there so she’ll sleep in car but then not in pram even though she’ll sleep in pram when I go out from the house. The one time I met my dad, he had to push the pram round as she just didn’t want to be in it and I had to carry her round.

@FATEdestiny yes it is my first child. I’ve been going out when it’s nap time but maybe I should go out when it’s awake time. What I might do is pop her in car seat part way through nap so she goes back to sleep then when I get to the other end I can feed and change her etc. Might try that instead.

Timing on going out entirely depends if baby will sleep in the pushchair/car. Or if you need her to.

If it doesn't matter if the nap gets cut short, I would get ready and leave the house at the start of the nap. This gives you some peace with an asleep baby while your out, on the off-chance baby does stay asleep. There's usually at least one nap in each day that's less important and could be sacrificed, as long as other naps that day are good.

If having a good sleep is important, then I would stay at home for the nap. Get myself ready to leave while baby is asleep and then be out the door ASAP after waking up, so we can be home again in time for the next nap.

If your out for long enough for it to affect two or more naps, you just have to make do and accept sleep wont be as good as normal for that day.

@FATEdestiny problem is when she wakes we feed and change so she’ll be cranky if I don’t do that first. It’s just so hot and miss. Hopefully when she’s a bit older and the awake windows are longer it’ll be a bit easier. Xx

My babies the opposite of your daughter! He HATES the car seat. Will sleep when the cars moving but immediately on stopping (traffic lights, literally any stopping) will wake and moan. Will sleep in a pram though!

when she wakes we feed and change

I think that's true for most. You just have to do it quickly and be all ready to leave as soon as you're done.

We got the little ones sleep app and stick to the routine on that for the relevant age as closely as possible.but it also tells you how much they should have in a day so if it didnt work cos we are out I let baby catch up the relevant amount later

We lived and died by the routine until DD stopped napping just after age 2. She was never a car or buggy mapper so all were in cot at home. Slightly limiting, but I loved knowing when she would nap and I would get some downtime! She rarely got overtired and this helped her to be such a happy little thing, and her sleep was brilliant.

I just used to time meetings / outings around naps, if it clashed we didn’t go!

I’m expecting no. 2 in August and no idea how that will work!

@Cherry85 when you say catch up. Say if they’ve only slept 30 mins in the car instead of 2 hours. Then 30 mins on way back. Would you add an hour to their next nap of 2 hours as I’ve been told don’t let a baby sleep over 2 hours in the day. So confusing lol. Xx

I had a very strict night time routine. During the day we went out and about in the morning and he'd usually fall asleep on the way home. So I would try and go out when he'd be awake - and if he fell asleep that was fine. With two quite a bit trickier as not on same schedule but he then went to all day nursery three days a week.
I found I could be a bit looser with the day time as long as the night time worked well so I could have time with my husband and a decent nights sleep. I started that routine the day he came home.

@RC1985 baby is 4.5 months now so he gets 30-45 mins in the morning, 2hours at lunch and 15 minutes at 4.45pm.

If it's the morning one he wakes early from and he then falls asleep 15 mins early at lunch I just let it go but always get him up at his normal time. If he massively missed the lunch time one I would either give him an extra nap or if he was ok let him go through until the afternoon nap and add it on the beginning again.

@Cherry85 my LO is 3 months old and I am following a routine by nanny Louenna on Instagram. She has 2 hours morning, 2 hours afternoon and 1 hour late afternoon. Bedtime Routine starts between 5-6 depending on when she gets up. But mostly we work an 8-8 schedule. I found the little ones awake times too long. She struggles to stay awake 2 hours let alone the rest.

@Pipandmum I’m going to try and go out during awake periods and hope she then falls asleep then if I’m still out.