Baby blues during pandemic and what's going on in America

[Layladylay234]

Had my baby on Weds. Have been on a massive high until tonight and have now come crashing down. So worried and fed up of this bloody pandemic - when will it be over? When will I be able to stop worrying about going to shops/seeing friends/sending my son back to school.
The terrible news in America makes me think what have so done bringing my lovely little baby into this world?

Breastfeeding isn't working today despite being fantastic yesterday,partner constantly giving bottles despite me wanting to wait a bit.
I know about the baby blues,I'm well aware. Im under the perinatal midwife and she's calling next week. Partner is not being very supportive, just turning away in bed when I'm crying.

Firstly congratulations on your new baby.

I’m so sorry you’re feeling like this and it won’t help but it’s completely normal to have all these feelings it’s completely overwhelming to have a new baby never mind during the current times. My baby is 7 weeks old and those first few weeks there were lots and lots of tears but it did settle. Please make sure you are getting the support you need from the midwife. Don’t try and put a brave face on it be open and honest.

You need to have an open discussion about feeding and what you want to do. I bottle feed so can’t give any advice but my SIL breastfed both her babies and I know she said it takes a while to get the hang of it for both you and baby. There is lots of support out there for breastfeeding and consultations via zoom etc. Please again speak with midwife to find out where that support is. If you do continue to breastfeed ensure your partner is supporting in other ways. Settling baby to sleep. Dressing them bathing them etc. But more importantly at this stage I feel looking after you. Ensuring you are fed and have plenty to drink if you are stuck under baby. Keeping on top of pain relief is also very important. Taking baby where they can so you can sleep. If you so decide to bottle feed fully they need to pull their fair share very quickly so you can recover properly. You’ve just been through a major trauma. Send them some links and info to look at and read to help them understand.

This will get better for you it just takes time. Sending love

Nothing but sympathy for you here op.

My DD was born when all of the beheadings were happening from Isis. I used to look at how perfect and tiny and innocent she was and feel such sadness and fear that the world wasn’t the beautiful place I wanted it to be for her. I felt such guilt.

Then all of a sudden things seemed more optimistic. Bad/sad things have happened since then, but do have a huge number of good things.

BF can take a while to get to grips with. With DS1 it took me five weeks before it clicked into place. Go easy on yourself and ask DP for support just in case he is one of those that needs it spelling out.

I am the child of refugees, my parents have lived through horrors and it's taught me to view things differently. Think about this way : the fact that you care about the state of the world is a credit to you so what you're doing my having a child is bringing more good people like yourself into this world and that's what creates hope.

Sympathies OP, mine is now 4 months but I felt like this too a few weeks back. I don't really know what to suggest other than look for the positives in every day. How is your older son with the baby? Mine adores his little brother and it makes me feel so much better seeing them interact.

With the feeding... Do you want to breastfeed exclusively, at least to start with? I've been very lucky and had no issues at all feeding both my kids, but I would suggest not doing any bottles /expressing at all for the first month or so to really establish breastfeeding IF that's what you want. Boobs work on supply and demand so if you give bottles early on, your supply will drop, particularly overnight. Have you got good feeding support? There's lots of groups offering online support at the moment that they would usually in person.

You're on a massive hormonal crash after giving birth, it's totally normal and most likely will pass in a week or so. Talk to your midwife, health visitor or GP if you don't start feeling a bit more yourself. Be kind to yourself, you just grew and birthed a human!
Re the breastfeeding - however you want to feed your baby is your choice and your partner needs to support you. Ring the breastfeeding network today and get some support with your choice.