My ex and I separated after over 20 years at the beginning of this year. I asked him to leave and said it was best we went our separate ways as I'd found out, not for the first time, he'd been messaging other women and god knows what else. I'd had enough.
All relatively amicable, he sees our dc a couple of times a week. However he has always said he wants us to be back together and it's finally sinking in with him that that's not going to happen.
Yesterday I was putting laundry away in my bedroom and ex rang our eldest Ds (14). Ds always has the annoying habit of putting the phone on speaker so I heard the conversation.
First question to Ds was, "where's mum, what she doing?", Ds thought I was downstairs so he said I was downstairs.
Then ex started to ask where we had been yesterday, we're we with anyone, was anyone sat with me, did I talk to anyone, what did I do last night....all trying to find out what I've been up to.
(Happily Single and I've nothing to hide, I'd taken our dc out for the afternoon for a picnic as it was gorgeous)
Then the conversation turned to ex wanting to be back at home and he would come back if I let him.
Now I've said nothing to my son or ex but I feel I should tell my ex not to put our Ds in that situation. My relationship with my Ds has become increasingly difficult since ex left (was always a good relationship) and I suspect ex is making comments to our dc when he's alone with them. Do I say something to ex? Speak to my ds? Leave it and let Ds make his own mind up on the whole situation? I really don't know what to do.