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4 year old turns from angel to hells angel!

6 replies

Jzee · 20/09/2007 16:27

My lovely little 4year old is having very bad tantrums. These generally happen when he's tired and I've just experienced an hour of non stop screaming. I have found it difficuilt to get him to stay in one place when he is naughty, and consequently it is now virtually impossible to make him stay anywhere still until he calms down. When he was smaller he used to sit on the naughty step, but gradually that ceased. Today, I was determined that he would stay on his bed until he calmed down and with that I was kicked, punched, pulled, pushed, anything really which would mean he could get off his bed. Anyhow, it seemed to eventually work and he finally gave in, calmed down and said sorry. If his dad is at home then he will stay on his bed when he's naughty, but with me he just won't listen. Please tell me that if I persist then he will eventually listen to me. I feel really exhausted by this and worried that one day he will cause a big scene at a friends house and they will be shocked by his behaviour. Most of the time he's a really good boy , but once a week he'll have a tantrum that is just awfull.

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fingerwoman · 20/09/2007 16:30

yes, be consistent and it will pay off. It'll get easier when he starts to realise that you mean what you say.

tissy · 20/09/2007 16:33

while you're holding him down on his bed, he's getting the attention he wants.

Put him in his room and shut the door, he's not likely to harm himself.

If he comes out before he's calm, put him back in.

if he breaks anything, it gets removed and not replaced.

He's old enough to understand. Dd went through a phase like this, and though she stil has the occasional tantrum, they are much shorter, and less frequent.

FLIER · 20/09/2007 16:41

thanks goodness its noy just me who has a 4yo ds who has startetd these tantrums again-thought we were past all that!
I was going to post a msg on mnet when I came across this, its always good when you realise you're not the only one going through it, I find. and they are so angry now, aren't they?

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Jzee · 20/09/2007 16:44

He definitely won't stay in his room - I have tried and he's just pulling at me with all his strength and won't let go. If I put him on his bed I can just about manage to keep him there. He's completely different with his dad, and will stay on his bed. DH doesn't shout or lose his temper he just tells him to stay put and he does. I'll just have to be persistent.

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msappropriate · 20/09/2007 16:46

I've got one of these 4 yr olds too! He's starting full time school soon so i hate to think what he will be like when factoring in tiredness too

Jzee · 20/09/2007 16:54

Well, he has just started school so I know he's tired and it's a whole new learning curve, but we were having these tantrums in the holidays so it can't solely be blamed on school. I suppose at the end of the day it may be my fault because I have become a soft touch and not disciplined him enough or followed things through as much as I should have. I remember my mum just reaching for the wooden spoon made me quiver - BTW she never actually used it, but I wonder how she got such authority?

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