Is there such thing as a best age gap?

[Firstimemam]

My DS is 16 months and my heart aches for a second baby, maybe this is because he's no longer a baby but a proper toddler now
(Tall boy, walking and starting to talk). Did you feel like the age gap was right? Is there even such thing as the right age gap between siblings?

This is interesting ladies. Maybe a bit of a reality check that it may not be as easy, having a miscarriage didn't even cross my mind. I must sound very naive to you but sometimes, if you're not in it, you forget that this could happen. I do believe I have miscarried before, DH and I were going out for about two years, I didn't even know I was pregnant, we were in our early 20s and at that time, it would not have been right for us. He lived at home and I was house sharing with 4 other girls in London.

It sounds like everyone has a different set and if this is then your new normal, you make it work or it just works. Lots of food for thought!

I quite like the idea of DS being potty trained before no2 comes a long but I don't really have any experience with potty training, it could be that he's 2 1/2 -3 when this happens? I actually bought a potty a few days ago, this morning I pulled down his pull up and he pooped in the potty. I know he's wayyyy to young but he poops at the same time every day, and I can see him pushing so thought I just go for it and it worked. Praised him but he wanted to touch it 😂 so took him up to clean him. Then we put the poo in the toilet and flushed it down. Again, I know he's too young and there is obviously 0 pressure from my side. He doesn't wear a nappy in the garden at the moment and looked at his foot in shock when he weed on it yesterday.

There are 22 months between my two. It was fairly tough in the very early days, but got a lot easier once DS2 hit 18 months or so. They're now 6 and 7 and the best of friends. They're very much on a similar level in most ways, into the same things and like the same games, so they entertain each other, although they do bicker at times. My DSis and SILs all have three to five years between theirs and seem to have had a more difficult time as the children have gotten older because they are developmentally at very different stages.

Oh absolutely OP, even though I had a relatively late (12 week) mc before my first, he kind of wiped it so it was a bad surprise having another recently! I guess what I'm saying is some things are not under your control.

We did halfheartedly try for what would have been a 2 year gap, but bottled out because we weren't sure we or DS we're ready. Now I know him at 2, he would have been fine, but you just don't know what your 2 year old is going to be like!

And we've just properly potty trained him, around his birthday, at 2-he got it right away. We have been putting him on the potty since he was tiny in the mornings, though, which we started doing because of really bad nappy rash. He was always very pleased with himself. If yours is doing that, just let it happen! It might be a while before he can tell you he needs to go, but he'll learn how it feels and what the potty is for. No harm!

I potty trained my son at 18 months, so it definitely can be done.

We were aiming for a 2 year gap, but I had a mc so the gap will be 2.5 years. I’m actually really happy it’s a bit bigger. The mc would have been due around his second birthday (in lockdown) and I feel like it’s a gift I’ve got these extra few months with him as my only. Hopefully they’ll be close enough in age to play together but he’ll be a bit more independent. He’ll also start pre-school in the last few months of my leave so I’ll have time with just the baby.