Access arrangements during covid19

[Pinkpanther28]

I'm very conflicted about what to do in this situation.
So I'm in Ireland and lockdown really kicked off in late March, and mid March my son's father suggested that we stop access which we both thought was responsible because he had a rather long journey and he lives with other people and carried on working (we video called twice but he is apparently very busy). So it's been 2 months and today he suggested that we start access again when the schools reopen (which is likely September) and logically that is very safe, however my 3 year old son is non verbal and has no idea what is happening at the moment. So I fear that if he goes 5 months without seeing his father that it will be very difficult to rebuild their relationship, because in the past if there's been a gap in seeing his father it will take weeks for my son to get used to him again. The current restrictions in Ireland is that you can meet people from outside your household in groups smaller than 4 as long as you maintain social distancing guidelines, however he's recently moved to a different county so I have no clue if he'd agree. So I suppose what I'm wondering is should I try and push him to video call and take more of an interest or let him see what happens when he shows up again? How is everyone elses co-parenting during lockdown? Any tips?

How much time did they spend together before?

My first though on reading your post was that you aren't co-parenting when the other party can only manage 2 video calls in 2 months, you are parenting and he is opting out.

You can't make him put in the necessary time and effort to build a decent parental relationship. This isn't on you.

It's also likely that he will not show any interest to meet for years.

Hey hun different scenario for us where by me and my son's dad have 50/50 custody and we have kept up the same routine throughout lockdown. When it first started I think everyone co-parenting was confused about what it would mean for them! Government guidelines say you can take children between households where you are co-parenting and are separated.

@Chasingsquirrels You're so right, it was 1 day a week which he'd often cancel. It really isn't my responsibility to force him. Thank you for the reassurance!

@Annaminna At this rate I wouldn't be surprised, he's been loosing interest ever since he started dating again.

@Cherryrainbow Hiya, yes, unfortunately I only discovered yesterday that Ireland are even stricter than England for keeping up court granted access. I wish I'd known this in March. Apparently even if you have to travel to see your kid all you have to do is carry your court order! I hope it's going well for you guys!