Every bottle is a battle

[Gin4thewin]

My DD is almost 6m. She has always been a nightmare to feed. She started off with reflux which has now gone and no longer a problem and now were just at the stage she screams and fights because she can. I think shes teething but i am so drained everyday because of her. Shes slept through since about 3m's with no problems. This last week shes waking up at 3am and screaming for anywhere inbetween 2 and 4 hours. She will only sleep if your holding her which i only do as a last resort and out of sheer desperation. I dread everyday, because every 3-4 hours, shell drink 60ml, then all hell breaks loose, Every. Single. Time. i end up wrestling with her to the point you can barely keep hold of her, shes screaming like im beating her, and the whole process takes an hour and a half usually, normally wiping her self out fighting and screaming so that she falls asleep. I cant go anywhere with her or my Ds as by the time ive finished 1 battle, its time to start again. Its not reflux. She would literally starve if i didnt persevere. Shes a good weight, has little leg rolls etc but I dread every day, every bottle, every battle. Im so drained by her. The thought of another 6 months of this makes me want to cry, im on the verge of tears every day as it is. Would changing formula help? Shes always been on cow and gate stage 1 or their comfort milk. I wondered if it tasted different she might be more inclined to drink it. I feel like its affecting my bond with her so much, im mentally and physically exhausted. Im home with her and her brother, all day everyday, no one to talk to, i just feel like im at breaking point

That sounds really really hard going. There’s a few issues there, but I’d probably consider giving the GP a call. Your baby sounds quiet a bit like one of mine, who was later diagnosed with a cow’s milk protein allergy. Best of luck.

Have you started weaning? We weaned early on the advice of the paediatrician and it actually really helped with tolerating milk feeds (baby was medicated for reflux). Get advice from HV or GP if you're worried.

I know how draining feeding issues can be, so sending hugs

I should also add that she ended up with lactose intolerance, so agree with pp about exploring that type of issue.

She already has purree/baby porridge/ yoghurt throughout the day. She was chasing after everyones food all the time
We took her off comfort milk about a month ago, shes been fine digestive wise with the normal stage one, wondered whether switching brands or moving to a follow on 6-12 milk, might taste different to her

I left a message with hv to call me and i have a phonecall with the drs for antidepressants tomorrow, im at that point. Ill also mention it to her aswell re DD feeding. I dont have any faith in HV, my local ones are pretty cack

I really feel for you. I hope it's just a phase or teething. With a bit of luck the GP will be helpful. Mine is very good and made a paeds referral with no quibble.

Agree with you about HVs. Mine was a sack of shit who luckily only came twice and never heard from her again!

Any chance of silent reflux? Both my daughters had it. Every bottle was a major battle, screaming, flapping, arching back, spitting the bottle out then screaming for it back. I dreaded every single feed. With DD1, I finally booked a doctors appointment & just broke down. Thankfully, I have a fantastic GP who immediately prescribed omeprazole & she was a different baby within 4 days. When DD2 has all the same feeding issues, I was very quickly back at the docs and again, one calm, smiley baby after a few days!

I wonder as well, does your daughter actually want her milk? My DD1 dropped you 2x bottles a day at 7 months. She much much preferred food & was never fussed for milk. She had a bottle early morning & bedtime. She flatly refused anymore! I used to worry but just made sure she got loadsa calcium. Lots of cheese, yoghurt, I made porridge with her formula & I made rice pudding with her formula..

Have you tried feeding her whilst she's completely vertical so her tummy is stretched on as much as possible? Or maybe less milk more often? And is her nappy dry or is she weeing after the first bit of milk?

This sounds like silent reflux to me. We had this with DD - infant gaviscon for a week and she was a different baby.

This sounds really tough for you! All pp suggestions are what I’d suspect also

But just to add my DS started fighting bottles at a similar age. Turns out he just didn’t want to be held anymore. So I fed him in his high chair. Eventually he rejected that also and wanted to be lying down on the sofa with me holding it until he could be bothered to hold it himself. Just worth thinking that it could be a personality thing rather than medical

DS goes through this from time to time when his teething is bad (he’s 5.5 months) with 2-5 min breastfeeds between 2-3 hour sleeps. I find using Teetha and Calpol every 4 hours really helps.

My dd was like this-Hated breastfeeding, hated bottles. Still hates milk now she’s 11years old!
She took to food really well so I made sure she had a good range of foods, Greek yogurt ,cheese, veg etc. Sometimes I mixed her formula in with her porridge or with fish pie.

I think it did affect our bond a bit as I took it as a rejection esp the breastfeeding debacle. But try to see weaning and trying lots of lovely new foods as an exciting next step and a fresh start

I got 3 different types of cup to try, see if that helps. Ill speak to HV/ Gp see if cmpa or silent reflux could be the cause. She cant have gaviscon because of it causing constipation, she had bowel surgery at a week old and they dont want to put strain on her bowel yet. The other stuff they prescribed has been recalled and i cant get it, the tablet version doesnt break down to a small for her weight. She is eating a bit more ive noticed last few days. I still dream feed her when i go to bed, which is delightful because shes so peaceful. She has lovely little legs rolls so the weights there, i cant really trust DP to feed her, if she starts battling him, he gives up or gives her to me anyway. I chance position, she usually likes being led across my knees as she watches tv or her brother and it distracts her, but i end up crippling my neck. She generally settles once shes over it, the second i sit on the sofa to feed her, she starts screeching, knowing whats coming. I worry about cutting her milk down as she was prem and lost so much weight before her surgery, shes still little for her age, about 4-6 weeks behind size wise i recon, but i think her weights fine. It just makes me anxious the thought of dropping too much milk. She generally has baby porridge in the morning, yoghurt for dinner and a apple/banana/pear purree and usually a finger biscuit or another yoghurt if she wants it . Christ, sorry thats so long

@ihaveoflate tell me about it. She did 2 visita, second when DD was 6weeks, started talking to me about weaning and not to feed her fecking swordfish! Shit...that what i got out for tea tomorrow🙈

If she is teething then she may be in pain and cant sleep. Have you tried a little calpol? Not even a full dose would do the trick 1.25 or 2.5ml to help calm her down enough to feed at 3am.

Also when are you doing the puree? They suggest timing this after a milk feed so the baby is full of milk first. You say she only takes 60ml at once but you dont mention the frequency. If its 60ml every 2 hours that's not so bad and maybe that's just how she likes to feed.