He just will not settle!!

[newmum234]

My 4 week old has been impossible to put down recently. I’ll change, feed (formula) and burp him, hold him upright for 30 mins to help the milk go down and get him to sleep, then put him in his cot. Within minutes of me putting him down he will wake up and start crying and screaming. I’ll then give him a cuddle and if that doesn’t work, more milk. He’s having LOADS as he’s being fed practically every two hours!

I’ve tried taking him out in the sling and the pram but nothing works - he will settle in both but as soon as we get home and the pram stops moving or I take him out the sling, he will start crying and the whole cycle begins again. I’m exhausted quite frankly.

He’s pooing every day or every other day and has regular wet nappies, so no concerns there.

Do you think there’s something wrong?

Sounds like he might be having a growth spurt/cluster feed. They do become more irritable if he wants milk I'd give him milk , white noise might help you can find videos on YouTube. If he doesn't settle in a few days or it continues then it might be worth trying the gaviscon x

Laylor

It works and it’s better than medicating a child

I was told by the midwives to put a folded up bath towel under the moses basket ( I had my moses basket on a very large footstool) to keep his head a couple of inches higher than his feet. It worked really well.
Also warm wherever you are going to put the baby down to sleep.

Ive no idea why you're being so defensive?!

My dc3 hated lying flat from the word go. He was exactly the same as your wee one in that as soon as I put him down or the pram stopped moving he would wake and scream. He didn't go to sleep easily until he was around 18months and generally woke every 40minutes at night as well until around 13/14 months. It. Was. Awful.

Things I wish I had tried:
Once baby falls asleep on you just gently move them down onto a blanket or soft t-shirt of yours on the couch beside you. Keep your hand firmly on them if they stir.
Same as above but down onto a big cushion, I think it would mould to support the baby better and make them feel more secure. Disclaimer - don't leave the baby alone on these surfaces but it means you can get up and potter around the living room or wherever.
Baby swing...looking back I can't fathom why we didn't just buy a bloody baby swing and give it a go!
Making a wee nest in the cot by rolling up towels and placing them under the fitted sheet, a bit like bumpers but safer

Anyway, it's all completely normal, just a bit shit, hope you get some rest soon x

Sounds pretty normal. Even my good sleepers didn’t like being put down at 4 weeks (lets not mention the middle one, he never slept anywhere, ever.). He wants to be on you as you feel safe and comforting. Read about ‘the 4th trimester’.

@laylor I was told the same by the midwives as well - baby must sleep in a firm flat mattress without tilting etc. I know doctors can advise it and they have the tilted bassinets in hospital but I think that's different because they assess the baby and make a call / baby is being observed in the hospital - I wouldn't want to do anything that goes against the safe sleeping advice unless it was approved by a doctor.

Sorry you feel I'm being defensive but not sure how you think that. It's your decision, im just advising to follow the guidelines. They are there for safety. If I'm told not to do something then I'm not going to do it. I'm a new mum I dont know any different.

Thanks @zaffa

Sounds like normal 4 week old behaviour to me - they love to be held all the time. Have you tried a dummy?
This stage is hard but will settle down soon.

I have a Snuzpod 3 crib (suitable for 0-6 months) and it comes with a special reflux setting, which tilts the top end of the crib slightly. Do you think it’s okay to use this for overnight sleeping? I’m sure Snuzpod wouldn’t have it as a feature if it posed a risk of cot death?

Have you tried a dummy?

I’m trying to hold out against using a dummy as I’m personally not a fan of them (no offence to anyone who is, it’s just my personal preference). I may have to try one though if things don’t improve!

Yes its fine. My Next 2 Me has a tilt function too.

I was the same with the dummy. Then I remember I got to about 3 weeks and caved. Honestly it was a game changer. I do think ive made a rod for my own back but those are problems i'll deal with later! You've held out for longer than I did!

Tilt the cot, honestly. The paediatrician told me to do it.

And yes, the dummy is your friend! I tried very hard to get my baby to accept it and I'm glad I did. It's the key to self settling and she still has it for naps and night sleep at 10 months with no problems.

I was advised to get a Dummy for mine as he had reflux as it helps it. When they suck the dummy they produce more drool which helps neutralise the stomach acid x

There are certain signs with reflux. The crying is different it’s a in pain cry. Their breathe will smell acidic. Babies at a young age can over eat to soothe the burning and then as they get older refuse feeding as they can relate it to pain. There’s no harm in getting them checked over for reflux. I researched reflux loads and made a list of all the issues mine were having it may be worth doing some research and seeing if there are other signs.

All 3 of mine had dummies for their reflux they loved them and I think it massively helped.

I was also a bit anti-dummy before I had ds. But when I introduced it at 6 weeks I had a different baby. It really helped settle him. Been a dummy convert since!

@ilovepuggies He does what sounds like an angry cry, which could mean he’s in pain? How can I get him checked over when the GP’s surgery is closed? Also, will they be able to say for sure that it’s reflux?

Could you call your gp for a telephone consultation? If you decide to do this make sure you have done your research and have all your points written down. I would also paint the worst case scenario as some gp’s will get reflux but others may not. I was very forward with my gp and luckily they were supportive. I asked for gaviscon and ranitidine (medicine that reduces stomach acid) as I had read ranitidine can be much more effective than just gaviscon. Other than that are walk in’s running? I have known from research very desperate parents take their babies to a&e but I think this was in severe cases where they may have been getting nowhere with their gp.

I also bought a Tula sling and this worked wonders for most of the day and some of the night. When mine were really young my husband and I had to sit with them on our chests and the upright position seemed to really help. My husband and I did shifts and took it in turns.

My son had gaviscon and ranitidine from an early age until weaning (6 months) it worked a treat with his reflux. They will try you on the gaviscon first - which doesn't do much- go back after a few days if it doesn't make an instant difference and get the ranitidine. You might have to insist and it helps to know what you're asking for.

It worked instantly for us. A life saver. You have to increase the dose as they get heavier - I rang the doctors and got them to calculate for me. Be careful, there are parameters and if it isn't working ask for a higher dose. One doctor swore blind ds was on highest dose and a different one changed it instantly.

In only increased when the reflux got bad again and eventually he was on such a minimal dose for his weight I just stopped it easy to wean off. If I ever have another baby I will asks straight for it and not faff around with other baby being unhappy

Also ditto the dummy :) he tree that at me at 6 mo this whilst I was trying to get him to sleep and that's when I stopped giving it to him. He never asked for it ever!

Reflux is diagnosed on symptoms, so im not sure its a 100% accutate diagnosis as theres no tests to know 'for sure', but it works for most.

My GP does video appointments

Thanks for the new replies.

So last night I used the reflux tilt on his Snuzpod and it seemed to really agree with him. He made lots of fussing and grunting noises when he was put down but there was no crying and he went off to sleep fairly easily after two feeds.

It’s only been one night so too early to draw conclusions yet, but could it mean he definitely does have reflux? If so, can it be controlled by tilting the cot and keeping him upright after feeds, or will he need medication as well?

He even got hiccups then stopped on his own after 5 mins in the crib, which is unheard of!

If that seems to be doing the trick then id stick with it. If it gets worse or stops working then id go down the medication route.