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Feeling really sad tonight

8 replies

Daisyxxchain · 17/05/2020 20:06

I have a mischievous five year old. She's sweet and 99% of what she does is creative in her mind. She makes heaps of mess with paper and pipe cleaners and bags full of random things. She's always sticking huge globs of playdoh to pegs and stuff and then just plonks it down. She just won't learn to pick up pens etc. I've tired lots of tricks. When she started school she got really good. But now she's going through lockdown it's like she's gone back to being a toddler. She has been mostly a joy to have home. But today she did something really annoying and bad. I can't understand why she did it. I'm almost embarrassed to write it.

My partner was upstairs in the bath with the door open. Our home isn't big so the bathroom doors two and half meters from where they were playing. The kids were safely playing in my 2 year olds room. I popped outside to peg out towels. The baby gate to the stairs was shut. I came back in to go upstairs to them 5-6 minutes later.

I walked through my living room to see my makeup and creams all dropping from the upstairs window. I went into full panic. Even though the side windows locked I presumed my toddler was in the top window hanging out or the side window wasn't locked after all. I yelled to my partner i think something bad was going to happen. I was thinking how I could get to the window and stop him tumbling out. Only for him to walk to the baby gate and say hi mummy. (I was so relieved)

I went to my bedroom and realised he can't get anywhere near the window. Nothing to climb on. Too high up. Phew. Side windows shut.

But my five and half year old who should know better!!! Had thrown all my stuff outside into the garden. I yelled at her about safety. Teaching her brother to do silly things. Going in my bedroom etc. Then I went downstairs into the garden.

She had smashed 2 bottles of full Estée Lauder foundation from my birthday. It was a rare treat with my money. . Cracked my face cream. Pulled the lid of my lipstick and squashed it. She did this in seconds without making a noise. She must have used the radiator to get a leg up to drop it out the top window. She can't fall out of this window either. It's too small.

But tonight I'm still upset. My mood feels awful. I can't get that feeling out my head of my son being ready to fall to his death. I can't get over how silly she has behaved. What an earth made her do such a silly thing? It's a really out of character thing. She pinches my lipstick sometimes. I tell her not to do it and I got her a lipbalm. Since then it's stopped.

I feel like an awful parent. My partner was meters away. They were safe. Our bedroom is safe apart from the makeup box under the bed! Nowhere high to put it. She can reach my drawers

As a punishment ive removed her tablet. No tele today since and I took one of her current favourite dolls and put it away. That made her really sad. I explained to her that's how sad she has made mummy. I said you can have your doll back if you behave all afternoon but I can't have my things back. I made her stay in her room for half an hour too.

I feel I've handled it the best i can.she needed a harsher punishment as she should no better. But I feel rotten that I had to tell her off like this.

Would you have done the same?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
JiltedJohnsJulie · 18/05/2020 08:42

What an earth made her do such a silly thing? I hate to be the one to tell you OP but she's a child and they do stupid stuff.

She has no concept of how much your make up cost or that it was a real treat for you either.

ScarfLadysBag · 18/05/2020 08:47

Children just sometimes do 'naughty' or silly things. I remember sticking something of my mum's down the plug hole in the sink to see it it came out in the toilet Grin It didn't.

It's annoying but there's no need to be ashamed or embarrassed about it. It's kind of a fairly normal child escapade that you'll tell her about in 10 years time and laugh about.

VerityB1 · 18/05/2020 09:01

Oh dear, she is being a naughty little pickle! Drives you crazy doesnt it, but in time you will look back and laugh thru rose tinted glasses ...

Here are some examples of more things to come following reading of Matilda and Horrid Henry books ...
*Brussel sprouts surreptiously put down the back of a bureau, stinking the house out and tricky to locate - the poor dog was accused for days.
*Wood lice kept in a box under the bed as pets and additionally, son not itching when he had nits as they were his pets (rather like Gnasher's fleas in Dennis the Menace).
*Throwing dad's watch and replacement watch onto the garage roof and ditto wedding ring.
*Getting sister to eat rabbit droppings, she thinking they were raisins.
*Dancing about wildly despite warning and accidentally smashing my specially sentimental glass perfume bottle.
*Suspected of doing revenge things to our toothbrushes but not sure what .
*Threw a stone at the kitchen window deliberately.
*And we wont mention teenage years as I still need more rose tints for that.

I would suggest your punishment was a bit harsh and also nothing left for the next thing that comes along. What about reward charts as well and time outs. For what it's worth, I had nothing on my dressing table until they were over 10.

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JiltedJohnsJulie · 18/05/2020 09:07

Verity you've just reminded me if the tine I poured a whole bottle of my DM's perfume onto one of my toys to make him smell nice and then denied doing it despite the bottle being empty and my toy stinking to high heaven Grin

Smartcasual · 18/05/2020 09:13

I can really understand you being upset at having your birthday make up ruined op, but you are (speaking kindly) reading far too much in to this! It was naughty of her but she was probably just bored! She has no concept of the make up's value, or of its importance to you.

Has she got enough to do under lockdown? She sounds like a child who has lots of energy and an enquiring mind. Grin I would be directing her hands to do other stuff ie helping you around the house with pairing socks, dusting, helping to empty DW etc ..give her things to do that you might think are slighrly above her capabilities (if safe obviously): 5 yr olds can be surprisingly capable. I know two of them who (having had a bit of practice) can groom Shetland ponies quite efficiently!

Drivingdownthe101 · 18/05/2020 09:19

I disagree slightly with the PP’s in that my 6 and 4 year olds don’t know the value of things, but they absolutely know that they don’t damage my things, regardless of value. Or their own, for that matter.
I agree though that it’s probably down to boredom/frustration. We’re all climbing the walls a bit, and children struggle with expressing emotions. Most children are really missing interaction with others their own age, and a 2 year old is a tricky playmate.

Daisyxxchain · 18/05/2020 09:23

Thanks all. It's definitely the worst thing she has done. Today's a new day!

Aghhh Brussels and woodlice under the bed hahaha. Kids are so yucky lol.

She has a tablet. We go for a bike ride and walk most days. We did the woods Saturday. Friday she baked cakes. We do her work sheets. She's got her brother too.

Obviously the days are abit dull right now. But I try to occupy her.

Thanks again.

OP posts:
OnlyJudyCanJudgeMe · 18/05/2020 09:32

As much as she might not know the value...she knows it’s YOUR stuff.
I don’t think you were harsh at all!

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