Help - newbie questions from a stb mum?

[BambinoJune]

I'm due my first in a few weeks and have a few random questions I don't know the answer to. I'm hoping MN experienced parents can help me out as I don't have anyone I can ask IRL. Sorry if I sound really silly! My questions are mainly to do with supervision / being with your baby at all times.

1. I live in a city flat, all on one level. Throughout day all the doors are open so each room flows into the next. Sitting at my kitchen table I can see through to my bedroom for example. If the baby goes to bed at a certain time, e.g. 9pm (in next to me cot in my bedroom), should I be in the bedroom with her from 9pm onwards too? I am totally happy to do this by the way, but just don't fully understand the advice. I know some people use baby monitors and even cameras now. I recall visiting a friend with her newborn in a similar 1 bed flat and he was asleep in the bedroom whilst we sat in her living room. All doors were wide open and he was just next door, we could hear if he cried, but I don't know if that's right or not? Very confused.

1. I'm hoping to use reusable nappies. After I've changed the baby into a fresh nappy I will need to flush the liner / sluice the poop away in the bathroom, and then put the dirty nappy in the wash bag. How do I do all this whilst continually supervising the baby? Or is it okay to put her in her bouncer in the living room and then pop back into the bedroom to clear up the dirty nappy?

1. If I need the loo / shower, do I need to bring her into the bathroom with me, say in her bouncer? How do others manage?

1. Is it acceptable for day time naps to be done in the soft sling / (don't think bouncer is safe) and for the baby only to be in the cot for proper bedtime (nighttime) sleep? That way I can be with them.

I do have a partner but he will be working a lot.

Thank you!!

Congratulations! I completely remember the feeling waiting, so much time to think!

1. If i were you, I'd get a moses basket and keep baby with you, just carry from room to room. It's best if they sleep with you nearby for the first six months, and the moses makes it much easier

1. Again moses basket, or to be honest with you i just pop DD down on the bathmat and keep an eye on her. You can leave the baby somewhere safe and secure for a few minutes, although youre probably not likely to want to for the first little while!

1. As above. Or use a sling, though that can be tricky!

1. Naps can be in the sling, in the bouncer (supervised closely) or a moses basket or more likely on you. DD didn't want to be put down to sleep for many months, so we just snuggled on the sofa for most of it!

I remember thinking lots of similar things before my DS was born! We always were in the same room as DS when he slept until about 5 months; at that stage, we put him to bed a bit earlier than us but still slept in the room overnight. I was pretty happy by that stage that the major SIDS risks has passed and we were close enough to him as we are also in a flat. I've only just bought a monitor now as we're going to transfer him to his own room soon (he's 9 months) and I want to be able to check that he's actually awake before I both getting out of bed 😂. We also had a Moses basket which I wasn't going to bother was but was invaluable not least as somewhere to keep him safe.

Showers/disposing of nappies/going to the loo, i just tend to leave the baby somewhere safe. In the early days, this was Moses basket or cot. He was normally happy enough just lying there and kicking for 5-10 minutes. Obviously you shouldn't leave them unsupervised doing anything dangerous but they can't get up to much in a cot before they can stand and my midwife said it was the easiest way to get 5 minutes for myself. It doesn't matter hugely if they cry too as it will only be for a brief period of time and they're not going to have come to any harm.

DS is 9 months and has never napped in his cot. His naps are on us (although less these days), in a pram or in a bouncy chair (mainly just for short naps). At some point I need to figure out how to get him to nap in a cot...

1. Newborns should be having all sleeps in the same room as you - the advice is to actually do this until 6 months, (we didn’t manage this as DS eventually became too alert and distracted by everything for this and need a quite, dark space by the time he was around 4 months.) I had a Moses basket that I could move from room to room and sometimes DS would fall asleep in his bouncy chair (you’re right, it’s not ideal, but I didn’t want to move him once asleep in in there - he had reflux and was a lot more settled in there than the basket) or just nap on me. Once the baby is older and has a set bedtime then I think what you suggest is fine. Until then, I would just take baby to the bedroom when you want to go to sleep yourself.
2. I haven’t done this myself so can’t judge how long this would take - a couple of minutes out of sight in hearing distance is ok imo. If longer I would just keep popping my head through the door to check everything’s ok.
3. As above - I didn’t, our bathroom wasn’t big enough for that. I left him in Moses basket in the bedroom while I showered quickly. Or I would shower in the evening when DH was home. I personally have never experienced this ‘not able to go to the bathroom alone’ situation that some seem to be in. Once he outgrew his Moses basket I put him in his cot while I showered/went to the toilet. DH works abroad a few times a year so when it’s just me needs must.
4. I can’t see an issue with that. My DS always fell asleep as soon as he was in a sling when he was a newborn.

I kept my DS with me. He's 10mo now and I still go in the bedroom with him. I do have camera monitors so do come out sometimes. But he has decided his new bedtime is 9pm and I'm tired then anyway so just go and watch Netflix .

I had a lay back bouncer that the seat was flat. I've seen some you can get but the seat is quite arched.

I used to put DS in his bouncer in the bathroom door way and have a bath and not a shower. I was always worried the room would be too hot for him that's why I put him in his bouncer.

DS napped in my arms a lot when he was a tiny baby. They need it. You aren't building a rod for your own back either before you get told that!

Enjoy all your lovely newborn snuggles!

Bouncer in the door frame* that was meant to be

I'm a FTM with a 7 week old, I can only impart on you what I've learnt!

1. Baby stays with me in the living room asleep in her moses basket then I take her to bed with me. I change her before I go to bed so do the transition from moses basket to next to me in one swoop. She doesnt wake up properly then either really. If she does, I squeeze a feed in too in hope for an extra hour or so before she has her early hours feed.

1. I'm using cloth too, you will be surprised how quickly you learn to do things with one hand (although sluicing not so much!). I have a bouncer in my bathroom so pop her in there while I do the things I need 2 hands for.

1. As above, for the first few weeks I slept her sleep in the moses basket in the living room (I live in a single storey flat while I had a quick shower/toilet but in the last week or so she has developed a sixth sense for when I leave the room so she goes in the bouncer in the bathroom while I shower. Pop some music on and she nearly always is asleep by the time I get out.

1. Bit of a theme with my advice but, GET A MOSES BASKET! Honestly, I wasnt going to bother but it has been a godsend. She has her daytime naps either on me/in sling or if I'm cleaning in the living room I put her in the moses basket. Allows me to have a coffee/eat some lunch with both hands!

Good luck and congratulations on your upcoming birth!

Hi! First time mum here......

1 - The guidelines say babies should sleep in the same room for the first 6 months. I havent done this because my baby is the nosiest but the most wakeful sleeper in the world. Nobody was getting any sleep.

2 - Sorry - I use disposables so cant answer here!

3 - Honestly I dont take the baby EVERYWHERE with me. If im going to move from one room to another and then be there for any length of time, i'll move the baby with me. However, if im just nipping to the loo or going to make a cup of tea I dont take the baby with me.

4 - Naps in the sling are fine. However I dont like it because it means I cant properly moniter awake time and sleepy time to stop an over tired baby (although this is less important in the first few weeks).

Honestly you'll just find your way with things and you'll figure out what works for you through trial and error. I thought my baby would sit happily in the bouncer but he hates it! The thing is just sitting unloved in the corner!