When do you take your baby to groups?

[Letsallscreamatthesistene]

Hi

Firstly i know groups aren't happening at the moment, but I assume they will do again in the future.

At what age did you start taking your baby to groups? And which groups? What did you do if your baby was being a nightmare at the group? Did you just leave?

For context, I have a 7 week old son and really want to go to some groups when we're able, but I have anxiety around being able to comfort him and his crying stemming from a particularly horrible hospital stay at his birth for which im having counselling for. However I dont want this to control what I do with him.

Depends on group some are specifically for babies so from around 4 wks. Think I went to baby massage at 6 wks. If baby cries you can feed them rock them. If it,s a baby group a crying baby is not an issue nor is leaving early or arriving late. 9Except if it,s something like baby massage where arriving late will mean you miss out.)

12 weeks generally. If she was being a pain I would take my daughter away from the main action but not completely out of the setting and try her in different positions, try a nappy change or offer a feed. I took her to baby massage (run by a health visitor), bookbug (run at libraries) both of those were free so you wouldn’t feel like you were losing out on money if you had to leave. There is a bookbug zoom on Facebook. I also took her to baby sensory which was 6 pounds a week and is now 5 pounds online but you can do multiple sessions including on the occasional Saturday a first aid or colic course. You can actually start baby sensory from birth. I thought that was good because they would explain different positions the same activity could be done ie hold them like this or this and then also explain this helps with development of a flat hand for crawling etc.

I took mine from 2 weeks because there was a bounce and rhyme class at the library on the street next to my house and it was good for my mind to get out the house.

Not going to lie, I didn't enjoy them. Some of the parents were quite cliquey and my LO had severe reflux so would often be crying or sick. However, the benefits of going outweighed staying at home. Plus, it's supposed to be good for their development even at a very young age.

Many parents who attend are on the same boat; feeling anxious, worried, overwhelmed. So just do what works for you, leave when you need to, get up and walk around with LO if it helps.

Enjoy once the time comes

Whenever you feel ready to. I went to the groups with my husband from about 2 weeks old until he went back to work at 5 weeks old. I then took a few weeks off as I just wasn't confident going out on my own (nevermind just being on my own!) with DD. Once I was a bit more practised at being a parent (and climbing the walls with boredom), when DD was about 8 weeks old, I ventured back out to the baby groups.

8 weeks with DC1, which was when I had recovered from the body shock of birth enough to want to attempt to leave the house.
We went to a baby massage, a baby singing, and a coffee shop meet up with my ante-natal class.
Baby massage didn't really work for us as it co-incided with a feed time, so generally I fed him. Listened to the instructions and tried them out at home later. But it got me out of the house and having human interaction which I need a lot of (still do - and he's 15 now!)

The other 3 DCs just tagged along to whatever we went to. From 2 weeks. Mainly village hall-style free play toddler groups. They were my life-line. Walk in, everyone argues over holding the baby. Toddler runs off to play with his 'mates' I get to chat/wash-up/make coffee in peace.

Baby groups are all about the adults. I think the people who don't need them, are people who either don't need much people-time normally, or who have a large supportive local network of adult friends and family.

Some baby groups help you to learn how to look-after and educate baby, (such as the massage or baby-singing) But they are still for the adults benefit, iyswim.

We went to a postnatal group from 6 weeks and then did Jo Jingles, baby massage and baby yoga from about 4 months. DD didn’t give a shit about any of them until she was older (actually she hated yoga so we quit that) but it was more for me than her anyway

Don't worry about your baby crying, usually there's enough room to take them away for a bit of comforting but any groups I've been to (baby massage, Rhythm and Rhyme etc) there's both babies and toddlers, there's always babies crying/toddlers crawling and running away with parents trying to control them I think it can be quite nice to take them somewhere where someone else understands.

We did baby massage when he was tiny. Then did baby sensory and music classes when he was old enough to sit up and enjoy seeing the stuff/participate - maybe 5/6 months

Don’t rush is my advice, you end up wasting money..

We did baby massage/yoga class from 8 weeks to 6 months. It was a fantastic class, it became the highlight of my week but my daughter really started to be awake & less fussy around 3 months. Before that, the classes were a bit stressful as she cry a lot & we’d never get through it! And at £8 a class..

We did baby sensory from 4.5 months. Again, I think this was fairly ideal. My daughter was awake, alert & made it through the session without many tears! There were some tiny babies who just slept through the whole thing. I didn’t see the point..?

My massage class gave me 12 really close friends. I found baby sensory less easy to navigate. People seemed to already know each other & I just made polite conversation. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Thanks all! Ive signed up for some online baby sensory classes. I know Eds maybe a bit young to get a lot from it, but really its more so i can maybe meet some other people.

I didn’t leave the house for about 12 weeks

Initially due to c section recovery and then due to exclusive pumping round the clock so could hardly move let alone leave the house

By the time I did get out I hated them

So we just stuck to meeting friends for coffee occasionally

The groups are for you, not for the baby. Don't worry. Boobies cry, he won't be the only one and other peeps will be sympathetic rather than judgemental. If you're worried it's a good idea to look specifically for groups aimed at the age of your baby. NCT often offer these coffee meet ups if you contact them directly.

Blame my phone for those typos, and I have no idea who taught it peeps! Not me :o

DD1... A few months? We moved back to the UK when she was four months. The HV clinic was at the local play session (in the days of Sure Start sessions)
DD2... Went to her first group at 12 dayys old. Sure Start staff basically took 20 month old DD1 off my hands and told me to enjoy my baby snuggles for a bit. Then as she got a big bigger it was often DD2 they took so I could concentrate on DD1 for a bit.

I hated baby groups until DS could sit up, I was always told where the tea was but couldn't take my pram in and struggled to make myself one holding a baby. People were welcoming but I found it awkward and I am a total extrovert

I took him to baby sensory and I found that it was so loud he hated it (I think he is an introvert)

Now I think he may like a group we are on lockdown.

I do a very social job and I didn't really like them like I say, but some people love them.
I met people randomly, I gave one lady my number who seemed nice in the doctors while we waited for injections!

I personally preferred playgroups to classes, the sort run for free or for a small donation by churches or other community organisations. They usually run for longer time slots and so you can drop in, it's not so annoying if your baby is asleep or feeding at the wrong time etc

We did baby sensory from 6 weeks as that's how old he was at the start of the term. I first took him out alone to a play cafe type thing when he was 2.5 weeks old as I wanted to get something done to celebrate my first mother's day. As other people have said the groups on mat leave are definitely for you and not baby, or at least they are until they're a bit older.

At baby groups it's expected that they cry/explode poo/need feeding etc and the parents/leaders will be comfortable with you doing whatever you need to do. In the groups I go to it'd be more unusual for you to not have a drama during the session as baby always knows when to kick off, hehe.
It's more on public transport where I panicked initially that he'd start crying and I wouldn't be able to stop him, but with a year of going on some form of transportation daily (Londoners) there have only been a few instances where I've had to get off early to see to him.

Never . I thought they looked really boring.

DS is 11 months out now, and pre-shutdown he went to daycare, but I never took him to groups. We do an online circle time and singalong now, but that's it. I might do some music classes with him when they open up again - I feel like he'll get more out of it now he's older.

About 3 or 4 weeks I think, not long after DH had gone back to work. I'd walked to the Health Visitor clinic at the local children's centre to get DS weighed, and one of the staff asked if I'd like to come next door to the bumps & babies group. I went almost every week for the next year after that.

I found things like bumps & babies the best for those early weeks when just leaving the house can be stressful. The children's centre, NCT, local churches and community halls are good places to look for them. Because they're not a "class" or structured activity you can drop in and out as you please - turn up halfway through, leave early, go one week but not the next - totally up to you. Baby can feed or sleep through the whole thing if they want to, and you get to talk to other adults.

If baby is being a nightmare, they won't be the first or last to have screamed the place down, and the other parents will be sympathetic - we've all been there.

I went to my first class at 7 weeks. Loved it.
No-one cares of they cry or need a feed. I was nervous to start with as getting somewhere for a specific time seemed huge!

I did Music Bugs (amazing) from 7 weeks
Swimming (not until 6 months)
Baby Signing (not until 5 months)
Baby Massage and Baby Yoga (12 weeks)
Breastfeeding Cafe (just a friendly meet up)

But the more you do the easier it is

We started pretty early but I had some people to go with (four of us from our antenatal group really hit it off and still are in close contact 15 months on!) and also DD was a very chill baby so it was easy to take her places.

I found it really good to get out of the house. Obviously when they're that small the classes are just for you. But being able to have a cup of tea and biscuit and a chat to other adults was most welcome! The most beneficial/enjoyable for DD was the baby massage class. And there are always crying babies at classes, it's par for the course. Sometimes it will be yours, sometimes it will be someone else's! And people are always feeding their babies, changing babies, etc.

Our favourite classes were the baby massage when she was tiny, the free song and rhyme session at the library, and baby sign language (Tiny Talk). We are still doing the latter online!