Good grief, what happened to Mumsnet being supportive? I'm so pleased for you all that you have compliant children. May their hormones never run riot and turn them into teenagers-who-know-best.
No, Soontobe60, my child hasn't always got her own way, far from it. But she is struggling without her normal routine and surroundings, having already taken some time to adjust to the move to secondary school. Not all children take this in their stride. She's also 2 years into puberty, and pushing boundaries. Which unfortunately for me takes the form of thinking she is right, her parents are wrong, life is unfair, school is too hard. There are thousands of books about parenting teenagers, because turning from nice children into little shits is pretty common. Unfortunately no chapters on how to cope with a pandemic.
Connie - there isn't room for her to sit next to me, plus i have calls and online meetings - I'm not deliberately being difficult, but my boss is watching to make sure I'm doing all my work as I'm the only team member with a child. Last week i blocked an hour in my diary and sat with her in her room whilst she did one lesson. That's when i emailed the school to ask for help, saying the only way to get her to do the lesson was to sit with her, it wasn't sustainable, did they have any ideas, and they replied don't do that. She needs the computer to do the work, some of the lessons are online, others need researching. Unless there is a way to block certain websites on a chromebook?
Craftygin - if the school did online lessons, DD would comply, she's asking for that. But they email the work eg "research what issues/benefits there are to China's one-child policy" (that was Geography this week), and that's it. No need to email it in, no feedback, no sanctions if not done. The online stuff is better because she knows the teacher can see if it is done.
If she was in school and failed to show for a lesson, or didn't complete homework, she'd get a warning and then detentions. But she doesn't care when warnings come from me, my opinion as her mother doesn't count (see above re teenagers).
It's the lessons that she's less strong in that she's ignoring, her resilience is poor. So she looks at the lesson, decides she can't do it, and switches off. Where in class, she can ask peers for enough help to get going with the task and of course the teacher is on hand and would notice if she was staring out the window. I can't replicate that.