Tween parenting advice!!

[XxRaeXx]

My oldest daughter Skye is 11. She is begging my husband and I for a phone because she wants to be like the rest of the kids in her class. I think we should wait another year or so until she's 12. My husband thinks that we should buy her one now. I don't know what to do, any advice would be greatly appreciated!

I think you should wait until she's a little older.

I had a phone at 11 but it could literally only do texts and calls - it was PAYG so if I used it too much that was it until my next top up, which was once a week instead of pocket money. Could you get her a phone, but not a smart phone as a compromise? That way she has the slight freedom of texting and calling friends but no games, internet, etc?

I can’t see any reason why s child would need a smart phone!

@Eggcellent29

So true! Nowadays social media and all that stuff is involved and at 11 I think it's a little unreasonable to have a phone.

If she is going to high school in September yes I would get her one. My dc school use a lot of apps for extra learning and also their timetable/homework planner etc. If she is likely to be playing out more with friends etc you can install find my iPhone so you always know where she is.

My dd is 10 (in yr 6) and has a smart phone, as do the rest of her friends. Its been lovely to see all of them chatting away on facetime while doing school work.
Without her phone she wouldn't have been able to do that.
She also gets school work sent to an app on her phone, and she has to record videos of herself doing book reports.
So personally I'm very glad dd has one. We haven't had any clashes over social media yet- just because she has a phone, it doesn't mean she has to have Facebook.

I think you should get her one, and most phones are smartphones so she will feel massively left out if she doesn't have a smartphone. I got one for DS when he was in year 6. Best thing I did was put Google Family Link on it. It allows you to control which apps they can install, how much time they spend on each app, and what time the phone will lock each night. DS is now nearly 13 and his phone is locked between 9pm and 7am, and I regularly lock it at other times if the phone is distracting him from eg homework.

Before I got this app we had some issues with downloading unsuitable apps but as I was checking his phone every night it didn't get too out of hand. You do have to be on them, and friend of DS the same age installed Instagram and her parents were clueless and not checking her phone and she had about 100 blokes following her and had managed to give her real name to them.

DS mainly uses his for games, YouTube, WhatsApp (he is too young for it really but we monitor it very closely and he knows what the rules are regarding messaging). Search engines have parental controls. DS is obsessed with Minecraft and Fortnite so mainly uses the phone to send messages to his friends about Fortnite, watch videos on YouTube about Fortnite, and chat to friends while playing Fortnite.

He also has the phone because he walks to and from school without an adult. DD is 10 and I'll probably do the same do her when she is in Y6.

Forgot to mention the Google family thing it doesnt allow them to download apps unless you approve it.
I was worried about him not looking after it but hes had it 18mth now only a slight mark on it. Also whatsapp has been great during this time for keeping in contact with grandparents they regularly messaging and video calling