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Original poster

Refusing to buy a rubbish toy

47 replies

Thebookswereherfriends · 24/04/2020 08:27

My daughter gets pocket money each week. Obviously we’ve not been anywhere to spend any money for a while, plus she had received some money from grandparents, so she had £40 saved up. She saw an ad for scruff a luvs and wanted one - I looked up some reviews and most said they really weren’t worth the quite high price (£30 for a large one). I agreed to her spending £10 on a small one. Ordered from amazon. She was thrilled with it, but I don’t really feel it was worth £10. She has now started on wanting the big one still. I have refused to let her spend her money on it. Part of the reason is the quality is poor, but also that she begged for a Furreal Ricky for Christmas and literally showed no interest in it once she had it, so I’ve been burnt before.
She is massively disappointed and upset at my decision and I don’t know how to help her get past it.

OP posts:

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Duchessofealing · 24/04/2020 09:09

OP I still remember years of begging for a Mr Frosty - my mum thought they were plastic tat. Then my OH got me one for Christmas - and my mum was right they are plastic tat - however I still longed for one for years. Children like tat - mine love LOL dolls, I think they are vile but if they save and buy their own or ask for them for presents at Christmas then I want them to have the joy of something they want. In your case she is saving up for it - I’d be proud she’s saving for something she wants, maybe look at it that way?

PlanDeRaccordement · 24/04/2020 09:10

The whole point of pocket money is so that a child can learn for themselves how to use money. It’s their money and should be their choice.
If you’re approving purchases, then it’s not your child’s money. It’s your money.

whatdoyoudonow · 24/04/2020 09:14

Duchess
I longed for a Mr.Frosty. My Mum wouldn't buy me one. Even when I used one my friend had (and realised how rubbish it was) I still wanted it.
I didn't care if it only made a teaspoon of slush at a time or that it came out in clumps of ice...it was great fun to use.

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Bagelsandbrie · 24/04/2020 09:16

Oh my goodness Mr Frosty! Yes! I begged my mum for one and when I got one for Christmas I was over the moon. It was the most useless thing in the world and I think my Mum cursed every time she had to crank the little handle but I was just so excited by it. Kids do remember these things .

Original poster

Thebookswereherfriends · 24/04/2020 12:46

Interesting. I’m clearly completely wrong according to opinion, but I’m going to hold fast on this one. Thanks for the input.

OP posts:

Thisismytimetoshine · 24/04/2020 13:00

I'm completely wrong but I'm holding fast? . Away with you, then...

ScarfLadysBag · 24/04/2020 13:03

Honestly, spending your money on tat is kind of a childhood rite of passage. It doesn't really matter if we think it's poor quality or rubbish; at the end of the day, it's money she has saved. If she spends it all on something then either a) she gets enjoyment out of it so it's not a waste or b) she doesn't get enjoyment out of it but will now have to save up again for the next thing, which has taught her a life lesson about being cautious and spending money sensibly.

Either way, it's a positive thing, really.

ScarfLadysBag · 24/04/2020 13:04

And yes, another Mr Frosty wannabe here. I used to circle it in the Argos catalogue hopefully. But no joy.

EveryLifeHasASoundtrack · 24/04/2020 13:08

I’m clearly completely wrong according to opinion, but I’m going to hold fast on this one.

🤣

Iwantacookie · 24/04/2020 13:47

I always wanted a mr frosty then a soda stream.
Dm said no to both. I brought my dcs both and we love them.

Soubriquet · 24/04/2020 14:10

So you weren’t really looking for an opinion, just confirmation you was right?

georgialondon · 24/04/2020 14:14

But she was thrilled with the small one so why wouldn't she love the big one. They are only kids once. Let her have it.

georgialondon · 24/04/2020 14:16

@Iwantacookie I still remember how much I wanted a mister frosty too and never got one. Parents don't always know best do they! These things aren't marketed to adults but kids will love them.

RubaiyatOfAnyone · 24/04/2020 15:19

So literally everyone’s answer to your conundrum was “you can make your child happier by admitting you were mistaken and allowing her to spend her money as she wishes as it is, y’know, hers and not yours”, and you’ve chosen to go “no, i’m definitely not doing that. I have a straw man example of where i spent my own money on something she didn’t like, so now i’m definitely not going to let her spend her own money on something she may like now.”

Why exactly did you post again?

yerawizadari · 24/04/2020 15:28

My dd found out the hard way that some toys are crap and not worth the money, but that's only because we let her spend her money on what she wanted.

A few days later she came up to me and admitted that the toy wasn't as fantastic as she thought it was going to be, and that she thought she'd wasted her money. She was a lot more careful about what she spent her pocket money on after that.

BusterGonad · 24/04/2020 15:28

I think you're being extreamly tight especially as we are in lock down and it's something for her to play with. I'm always baffled by these threads, why give her pocket money if you're going to dictate what she spends it on?

PlanDeRaccordement · 24/04/2020 16:19

Lol. Go ahead ignore us OP.
Your DD will learn this lesson at 18 with her own money when the stakes are much higher. Everyone learns this lesson for themselves at some point and it’s better to get good spending and saving habits when young. It’s not something that you can teach by parental control.

jackparlabane · 24/04/2020 16:41

We apply some guidance. If it's under 10 quid, then I generally let dd 'waste' her money, though I may be purposely too busy to go on the internet and order something for a few days.

She did want to save all.pocket money and Christmas money and birthday money for a Poouis Poouiton bag which contains a plastic unicorn and makes rainbow poo. Or something equally shit. Which eventually got reduced from 100 to 50 quid because it was so shit. DH and I pretended the internet was broken for a while.

Iwantacookie · 24/04/2020 18:00

@georgia I still remember the tune from the advert too

whatdoyoudonow · 26/04/2020 10:27

Interesting. I’m clearly completely wrong according to opinion, but I’m going to hold fast on this one. Thanks for the input.

Not much point in starting the thread really.
You just wanted people to agree with you.

whatdoyoudonow · 26/04/2020 10:30

FWIW, DD wastes pocket money when she was young and was disappointed when she realised how rubbish some things are.
She's a teen now and always thinks twice before buying .
Agree that it's a good lesson to learn early on.

Sunshine1235 · 26/04/2020 10:33

I think the whole point of pocket money is to teach children about responsibility and consequences etc of having money. Therefore it makes no sense to dictate what she can and can’t buy in this way. If you don’t want her to choose and learn for herself then don’t give her pocket money or reduce the amount so she can’t build up this kind of cash

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