6 year old who can't entertain himself

[Babytalkobsession]

Help!

Our six year old has never been one to play for long (despite being obsessed with getting new toys and asking for toys for Christmas & birthdays). He doesn't seem to be able to concentrate on anything for long. Talks continuously. Never just relaxes.

Under normal circumstances we go out every day, I have to for my sanity to fill the day. We've coped better than expected but I've just completely blown my top at him for moaning & pestering again

Today we have made a huge den & then made pictures together to decorate the den. We've played Lego together, been for a short walk / scoot together He's played football in the garden with his dad. But I run out of steam at this time of day and just wish he'd bugger off and do SOMETHING on his own!! He's pestering for a water fight as he got a new water gun from his grandparents.

How much is normal in terms of parental input? I just can't sustain the level of entertainment he requires. Friends kids seem to go off into their imaginations but DS doesn't seem to have one. He'll set up a game , like building the den, but once it's built he doesn't know what to do in it.

Our younger ds (3.5) plays and bumbles around brilliantly!

Interested to hear if anyone has found a solution 🤯

Screens. This is why God created screens.

What devices does he have?

My 7 year old would spend all day on his playstation if I allowed it. But its been such a blessing in this lockdown as he is never bored and can talk and play with his friends.

It sounds like you are managing to entertain him however have you tried to defer your involvement eg if you go and play for a bit I will come in shortly and then when he does reward him.

You may need to 'teach' him how to play on his own, gradually increasing the time.

Being first born he has had your attention and perhaps your younger child has always had to 'get on with it' being the second born.

It is strange times, be kind to him he may be needing reassurance and this is how he shows it!

I understand it is demanding/draining but he is still quite young with a short(ish) concentration span ☹️

The Nintendo switch lite has been a god given miracle in this house.

If he isn’t used to playing alone, he probably won’t be able to do so for more than a few minutes. Try setting a timer and tell him when it rings you’ll do something together.
Also, tell him in advance when you expect him to start playing by himself. Knowing what to expect is a huge thing for children, and they are much more likely to participate without a fight if they see it coming.
Always be within supervision distance, of course, but stay out of sight. He probably won’t do anything but stare at you and whine if he can see you the whole time.
Help him plan.Sit with him and ask him to make some plans for how he might spend the time playing alone – he probably needs your help with this. For instance, tell him he could start by reading a book, and then move on to playing with puzzles and then Lego.
Sometimes my ds will pick something to play with (his fire engine are especially popular) but sometimes he needs an little inspiration. I might help him build a fort or start a block city for him. It’s worth spending a few minutes helping your ds get involved with an activity.
I do respond once or twice to requests to “watch this, Mum” or “look at this awesome tower, Mum!” I admire what’s going on, comment on how nicely he’s playing, and maybe ask a question (“did your firefighter make any rescues today?”).
When the time limit is up, make sure you turn your full attention back to him and show some genuine interest in what he’s done.
Don’t worry about mess! If he’s playing nicely, I’m not going to complain about toys all over the family room. When playtime is over, we’ll probably spend a few minutes picking up together, but while he’s playing, he’s free to play as he wishes (within reason).
Swap his toys around. Gather up some toys, put them in a box and put them away for a few weeks. The items will seem new to him when they’re reintroduced and will make for a good distraction from the lack of your presence (for a little while, at least!).

Thanks for the replies.

He does have a Fire which he uses a bit for playing Sonic, and he watches tv / YouTube and plays Mathletics a bit. We don't have a console or switch though. Kind of hoping to hold of a bit, plus he's really physical and full of energy.

I will try to set some limits. I just hate playing, even more so if I've been bagged into it. I'm happy to bake, colour, take him places, do puzzles etc but hate playing and I'm not good at coming up with ideas.

I think we need a complete overhaul of the toys we have and put some away to create some newness.

I'm going slowing mad. Don't even get me started on how much he eats! He is demanding something constantly 🙄

If you can afford to get him a Nintendo Switch right now you would honestly never look back. Theres so many games for his age range and then of course the family ones that you can all play together.

My older boy was the exact same at that age. Even now he can't do anything for himself lol. The only thing I remember that would keep him entertained for ages (apart from screens) was water or sand. So if i filled a paddling pool he would spend ages playing....even if it was too cold to actually go in it. Or a scooshy gun or something if he can refil it himself.

My younger boy is 7 now and he entertains himself easily. We have a mat we put in the garden and he just flips and turns on that plus the trampoline for hours.

Will think about it Morgan. Planned to get him one for his birthday in autumn but maybe now is the time!

Beingyellow we filled the paddling pool at his request, a bit of effort cleaning it etc and time filling it. Once it's done he wonders back indoors mooching and whinging

Chickadee / Ricekrispie thank you for your detailed suggestions. I really appreciate it

My DD 6 is the same - if I hear "Mummy watch this" once more I'll give her something to watch. She just needs attention all day it's exhausting. Even though she's generally a pretty good kid.

My 8 year old DD is the same.

She can't do anything on her own.

We have started building a bored hour into the day. 1 hour on her own in her room without screens.

First day was hard, subsequent days not so. She decided to write the beginning of stories, draw pictures etc.

She is having way too much screen time, but it's the only thing keeping me sane.

Love the idea of a bored hour. Mine are young but I'll definitely be introducing this when they're a little older (DD1 2yrs and DD2 4 months). Children need to be bored to build up their imaginations - I'm sure I read some research to that effect.

Really loving these suggestions and also the understanding that I am not alone. A 6 ur old girl. It's relentless. There's also a 3 yr old...

Basketball hoop?

Can I recommend this: studio.code.org/home

and "scratch" online. scratch.mit.edu/

You can do it via a laptop, learn to code, with short videos and tasks to keep them going.

Mine could spend all day on it, my oldest made his first game recently!