Breastfeeding baby biting and refusing feeds!

[marzipan81]

Hi

Hope everyone is doing ok in this crazy time. This is my first post on Mumsnet. I'm breastfeeding my 9 month old and the past few days she has started biting me and refusing feeds. I'm exclusively breastfeeding, she will not take a bottle at all. This evening at bedtime she wouldn't feed at all, I tried several times and she opened her mouth as if to latch but just bit me and wouldn't feed. I'm so upset, I'm not at all ready to stop feeding her. She's my last baby and I really wanted to feed her for a lot longer than this. Especially now with coronavirus. I also really don't want to pump or bottle feed. I've read all the tips online and have tried saying no and taking her off etc but it seems to just be getting worse. Has anyone experienced this and managed to keep feeding? Any good tips for fixing this?

Thanks so much.

Hello! No tips I'm afraid for getting baby to keep feeding, but my daughter did exactly the same thing!. Probably a little later at nearly 10 months.. she was down to just two feeds a day, morning and night. She dropped the evening one (just wanted to sleep!) And then within a week did not want the morning feed 🤔 but I gave her a cup of formula in the morning. The way I looked at is was that is was earlier than I wanted to stop (ideally wanted 12 months), however the point of weaning is so by a year they are on food and not reliant on milk etc. Is your little one a good eater? I have put my daughters early transition down to her good eating! And I make sure she gets lots of calcium through yogurts ,cheese sauces, and milk in recipes etc. You have done AMAZING for getting this far! Ps I have heard that some babies do have a bit of a wobble and then get back to normal, I was like yes this is the perfect time!

Sounds like she's ready to stop. Remember that youre breastfeeding for her benefit not yours, and try formula or expressing and giving it to her in a sippy cup.

Hi, I'm afraid I'd echo your previous replies, DD2 did the same at 19 months, and I had to stop completely as her bite was quite brutal. I did express for a short while, mostly for my own relief.

I've not known anyone who managed to break the habit, but do understand your wish to keep going. Maybe try giving water to drink in a sippy cup so she gets used to the idea of a drink from a different source, and perhaps try expressed milk after. I don't know if another adult would have more success, to break the connection of you with milk. I do understand if that feels wrong, I only ever breastfed my dds, and know how the connection is quite unique. Good luck, and best wishes in these difficult times.

It sounds like she’s going through a nursing strike, have you tried pumping to keep up your supply? Babies don’t normally self-wean at 9 months so that would be unusual. Have you looked in her mouth for signs of thrush that could be causing her pain when she feeds?

Hi all
Wow thank you all for your replies, it really helps. I did manage to get her to feed today but with much persuasion. I had to keep trying and trying in different rooms of the house and eventually I started humming twinkle twinkle and she relaxed and had a great feed and fell asleep! This tells me it's anxiety related. I'm sure she's picking up on my stress with everything going on at the moment. I read and read loads of web pages last night on nursing strikes and they all give the same advice, as the last poster said when baby is under a year old it's very unlikely to be self weaning and most likely to be a temporary nursing strike which can happen for a whole host of reasons, and you should persevere and pump if baby won't feed. I'm going to keep persevering and hopefully she will relax and go back to normal. I'll update this thread again with how I get on because I've seen lots of other mums on various forums having the same problem with 9/10 month olds, this just seems to be the problem age for nursing strikes and biting!

I would assuming teething or a phase.

Still bf a baby at 9 months really IS for the baby and not the mother. Show me the science that says otherwise, please. You’d still formula feed up to a year. That’s to the unhelpful poster who suggested you were perhaps doing something due to selfish reasons.

Some things that help, make sure position is good. Tend to let older babies do their own thing but go back to tummy to Mummy and mouth level with breast and don’t let them dangle, so support their body fully on a bed or sofa.

If she bites move in towards breast (don’t pull back) and break latch using your finger is she continues. Your supply may be slower, so switch feed by quickly moving from breast to breast until you feel the letdown reflex. Tends to stop the frustrated biting.

Dealt with it quickly in mine and fed for months still after.

It’s really normal at that age. They bite, but they don’t mean to. A firm no and un-latch, but they eventually start up again. Mine went about 12 hours without a feed once (also wouldn’t take a bottle), but it sorted itself out and he never did it again.

Ouch! That sounds both painful and frustrating, but really great to hear that you’ve had a better day today.

My suggestion for a nursing strike was going to be to try going to a quiet and/or darkened room, or try something like having a bath together (opportunity to relax and have skin to skin time which can help). Sometimes there’s just too much going on and they need time to calm down before they’ll feed. My DS has been like this recently when he’s teething, plus all the extra noise from being stuck inside with his older sister.

Glad you found some good info OP - please ignore pp who suggested formula is the answer; of course it's not and you are quite right that self weaning under 1yo is very rare. My first thought was teething to be honest. My 2yo was a fussy feeder and I found feeding in the side-lying position in a quiet room to be the best way. It was a bit of a pain as he wouldn't feed when out but I'd just give him solids and water until we got home. Singing as you found and gentle back patting can also help to calm. White noise can be useful too. I ended up feeding him for 18 months so he definitely wasn't ready to wean at that point!

Fab advice here. Keep going. My last baby was a biter, and would switch from my nipple to the tender bit closer to my armpit, chomp down enough to leave a bruise and then smile up at me! Being quiet etc as advised really helped her and we carried on until she was a year.

Another one to say it's probably teething and 9 months is very young/rare to self wean (& milk, breast or formula, is still their main nutrition until 12 months so it is important). My son went through a phase of biting me while bf and just generally when he was excited (arms, legs etc), I think partly just because he could. He moved on to something else after a couple of weeks. He also had a 4 day nursing strike where he wouldn't even take milk off a spoon, was extremely stressful at the time but again, it passed. I wouldn't worry too much just keep offering regularly.
I also found at that age he was very easily distracted by anything and everything. Giving him something to fiddle with while feeding, a muslin/small toy etc kept his attention on me/the boob and not everything else.
Hope this passes soon for you.

I’d say it’s teething. Highly unlikely she would self seen this young. You can give the National Breastfeeding helpline a call to have a chat with them if you are worried www.nationalbreastfeedinghelpline.org.uk/

Wow thanks again, really great tips here. I'm amazed how much support I've received here in 24 hours :)
I also think teething could be part of the problem as her cheeks are a bit inflamed and she's a bit irritable. I will try all these tips tomorrow and let you know how I get on!

Hi all

I've been meaning to update this thread with how I got on. I've managed to get my daughter feeding again. I just really persevered and kept trying when she refused. I also didn't give her milk in a cup/bottle and she hardly drinks any water so I knew she would be thirsty. She came back to it when she was ready. My advice to other mums experiencing this is to not give up if you really want to feed for longer. I was devastated when I thought my daughter was self weaning. But every bit of advice I read online said a baby under 12 months is very unlikely to self wean and it's just a phase or something like teething pain stopping them nursing temporarily. A few things I think helped her to learn not to bite. I always feed her in a quiet, dark ish room. If there's anyone else there or any distractions she won't feed. I sing twinkle twinkle while she's feeding and I rub her back or pat her bum the whole time, and I make sure she's well supported and not dangling. Then when she lets go without biting I make a big deal of it, I do a big "yaaaaay" and clap my hands, lift her up in the air and give her loads of kisses, and she loves this. She's started anticipating the praise and looks up at me while she unlatches with no teeth! She still sometimes gives me a nip and when that happens I unlatch her straight away and say a firm no and there's no praise, and she definitely knows the difference. Hopefully this is helpful for others and I wish you all the best of luck x

That’s brilliant news, I’m so pleased for you. My 11mo bites for a few days every time he gets new teeth so will be trying your tips

the baby needs weaning on to solids, keep up bf morning and night

Oh I'm so glad, only reading through the thread now saying 'no no keep going', as it was clear you really wanted to and highly unusual to selfwean at 9 months!!! I got dreadful latches around that time and it was teething. Nursing strikes are common. I was going to say there's a breastfeeding solutions for every breastfeeding problem if you want to continue. Lactation consultant your next call if friends/online support not getting to root for you. Well done.

PS even under 2 unusual unless low supply or adult lead.

NotMorePolitics I'm assuming baby is on solids a while now!