How much sleep should an 8 year old have and how to help her get to sleep?

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My 8 year old dd goes to bed at 8pm, reads for a bit and then in theory goes to sleep, except she doesn't. She claims that her friends go to bed later and that she's just not tired and having asked their parents in some cases it's true.

It's often 10 - 11pm and she's still awake in her room - should she be up later? Any ideas on how I can help her sleep?

Oooh, we often have this with DS - he claims he's just not tired. We make sure he has the usual quiet bedtime routine, no pc/computer games/tv etc etc, but to no avail. I've started using lavender on his pillow, and I bought him a relaxation tape which he listens to, and that has helped.

I was the same as a child, the problem was that I was shattered in the mornings. My body clock is the same now I'm an adult except I have to get up early as I have three dcs!

I think cutting down on television in the eveing would have helped me, also wind-down things like a warm bath, soft music to listen to, maybe even some lavender oil on my pillow.

Also does she do anything physical after school?

cross posts with paolosgirl!

Is she visibly tired during the day? Some children do need more sleep than others.

Even at this age a clear bedtime routine does help.

DS1 (8) goes up to bed at 6.30 pm, we read together for about 20 mins, then I tuck him into bed and he reads on his own. His light goes off at 7.30, and I switch on a CD of soothing music. He often likes a hot water bottle to cuddle too - even in summer - not a very hot one, and this helps him to nod off.

He always gets up at 7 am, and usually wakes before then no matter when he goes to sleep, so he does need to get to sleep in good time.

At 6.30 we're eating dinner, if we've both been working, or they're getting ready to go out to cubs/rugby/whatever. DS goes to bed around 8/9pm also, depending on what he's been doing.

depends on the child. Does she have to get up early?

dd2 (8 next month) goes to bed at 9.00pm. H reads to her for 20 mins. Far too late imo, but dd1 has to get to bed too, so no intervention on my part.

Depends on the child. My dd has never needed as much sleep as other children. She stopped having a daytime nap at 18 months and I soon realised it was futile to try to impose a routine of early nights on her. She's the sort of child that never gets grouchy after a late night so I've just accepted now that she needs less sleep than some of her peers.

That said I do like her to be in her bedroom before 9 o'clock because I don't want her watching post-watershed tv. She is allowed to read for a bit, usually up to about 9.15 then I'll tell her to finish when she gets to the end of the chapter.