Bad mum

[Nammech111]

Does anyone else feel like a bad mum?.. I feel like I must be doing something wrong.
I have friends with babies similar ages and they have been sleeping through since 3 months, they are rolling, saying mama!!.

My little one is really thriving but at 8 months , never wants to sleep, wakes at 4.45 in the morning, won't roll, isn't pointing, isn't saying mama!! , which to be honest I thought was fine because shes is young, until I met my friends and they seem to be nailing it, not finding it difficult at all.

I'm exhausted, even during the day she wont let me out of her sight. I know I shouldn't compare I'm just feeling like such a failure, I'm very affectionate with my DD and she is with us, maybe I havent let her be as independent as they other babies

Sorry I just needed to say it.

Never compare to others! It just makes you feel shit, and I would say a lot of other parents exaggerate how great their little ones are.

My DS is 9 months old and has just started sleeping through(7.30pm - 7am), he has a Ewan the sheep and when he cried I would go in, whisper to him "im here", give him a kiss and put the sheep back on, then leave. I rarely picked him up unless he was hysterical. It was a bloody long road, sometimes I was up every 30mins to him, but it's finally paid off.

Do you go to any baby groups or classes? Perhaps being with other babies and parents will help her relax being away from you - she can still see you and be physically near you but is occupied with playing and socialising.

My DD is 8 months old, a crap sleeper and teething so really clingy at the minute. It is bloody hard work and I am struggling, I was in tears last night because of exhaustion and DP was working late, so no help with tea and bed time routine. I can't say I'm enjoying this baby stage very much and I hope things will improve. You are not alone!

Oh op! Please don’t worry. Both my dd’s didn’t start walking until they were 18 months, both had sleep “issues” and very much like your lo, complete with being regaled by other mums about how rapidly their dc were advancing. I parent the same as you and now, at 6 & 4 I have been advised that both are ahead of expected levels. Just carry on doing what you’re doing. Just enjoy it, you’re doing it the way your lo needs, no need for leaving to cry.

Your DD sounds like my eldest who is also a redhead. He screamed constantly for the first three months of his life. I held him for naps. He was 'late' rolling, crawling and walking. He didn't walk until 18 months old. He talked before he walked. His saving grace was he did sleep through. Mainly because he never napped in the day so probably just gave up at night. I have no magical advice on how to make it happen. Luck and genetics I think.

You just muddle your way through it. You're keeping her alive, you're doing a great job.

Do you have anyone to support you? Friends or family who can take her for a while just so you can catch up with some rest?

Oh, I also cuddled both of my boys to sleep at night until almost a year old. Never needed to cry it out. Get a comfy chair in their room or your room, get your phone or tablet ready and enjoy the cuddles.

@fatted I never would have believed it before but they are fiery little things. Her dad and I have brown hair so no idea where the red has come from, people keep saying looks like I've kidnapped her 😂.

I do need to get a comfy chair in there, she is actually looking exhausted. She's not seeming herself today so could be poorly but I think she's really over tired too, we will get there.
I can't seem to sleep when she's not with me, I'm a worrier as you can tell and I just cant switch off.

@Phoenix76 thank you, I've read that they have actually done studies that baby who have been cuddled more develop better, it just feels hard in the moment like it's never going to end.

@Toastiemaker I have had tears also, reading all these comment gives us hope, sounds like we are in the same boat. Its 'Nice' to know we arent alone when it can really feel like it.

I'm feeling a lot more positive after reading all the comments, I guess as exhausted mums we do have our down moments. Thank you everyone