New baby & Nursery

[Bol87]

I’m due DD2 by elective section a week on Friday. DD1 is 2yrs10mnths & usually goes to nursery Tues&Wed, which she loves. She’s a really loving, kind little girl but also very headstrong and a tad possessive. I’m fully expecting a bit of an adjustment struggle, everytime I’ve held a baby or even had another child on my knee, she’s burst into tears 😬

Assuming all goes OK & I’m home over the weekend, would you send your little one to nursery that first week? I’m feeling all emotional about her feelings & this huge change to her life she can’t really fully comprehend. I can’t bear the idea of her thinking we’ve sent her away or being tearful at nursery. Her nursery is brilliant, I know they’ll be so caring & look after her but still breaks my heart!

I’m keen to keep her routine as normal as possible in the long run for her sake & my sanity but wondering if for the first week, it’d be better for her to just be with family for comfort & adjustment.. 🤔

Thanks!

I guess it depends, does she enjoy nursery?

DD loves it and sometimes asks to go on her days off, so when #2 arrives I would be happy taking her because she loves it and the normal routine there would be good for her while also giving me a break with the baby. She will be similar age to yours when baby arrives

I would. She can then have 2 days to run about and play as usual, not having to sit indoors whilst you recover. You can use that time to snooze if baby does, have some 1-1 time with baby without feeling like you need to entertain toddler.

Theres another 5 full days in the week she will be home, plus mornings and evenings.

We're expecting number two in the summer, DD will be two and attends nursery full time. We're going to leave her in, as she loves going and it would be a far bigger upheaval for her to suddenly be at home everyday. Not to mention I won't be up to doing much with her due to section and getting bfing established, so I think she'll actually feel less rejected by staying in her usual routine.

Plus, nine months later I'll be back at work and she'll need to settle back into nursery, which I think would be much harder on her.

Completely up to you, but if she enjoys nursery I'd send her, both for the stimulation for her and the break for you.

Best of luck!

I would send her in. DS was 2.5 when I had DD by section and honestly I needed the time when he was at nursery to do some recovering!
He goes in 4 days a week and still is while I'm on mat leave and having the structure really helped him in those early days. The nursery staff were also great at supporting him through the changes at home which really helped. Definitely keep the normal structure of things.

Yes absolutely send her and keep her routine as normal as possible!

She’s not going to think she’s been sent away, she’s going to think it’s nursery as normal! And you’ll probably enjoy the break from her. Plus if she does think that for some reason, you’re just pushing the problem a week later. After she’s had a week at home with you

Also I know all 2 year olds are different, but I had a section with DC2 when DC1 was 2.3. He was (and still is) extremely energetic and boisterous and I could barely deal with him for the first 2 weeks. Apart from the cluster feeding newborn sucking the life out of me, I literally could not physically manage him as he would try and jump on me. Fortunately DH was on leave so I didn’t need to, but those 2 mornings that week he went to nursery were such a breathing space as DH watched the baby and I took a shower and a nap in peace.

They’re now 2 and 4 and DS has no memory of his sister not being here and DD adores her big brother

I would send her in too. DS was 2 years 4 months and I sent him in after having the baby, he was so excited to tell them all about his new baby at home.