I am all for teaching resilience. I know my kids aren’t perfect- I have to live with them! I know!
But I am getting SICK to death of other people- adults- never believing them. It’s really affecting my youngest.
There has never been an example where they have lied over an important and been found out. Ever. Yet over the last few months there seems to be accusations of lies by other kids their age- often over tiny things then blown up by adults (not always their parents, sometimes a neighbour/sport coach) where my child gets blamed for something they haven’t done, are accused of lying, they are put down and then when the truth comes out, they are never apologised to and the issue seems to hang over them despite it being proven they weren’t involved/at fault. Interestingly the kids have always moved on, rebuilt after upset and apologies given/accepted etc but with the adults that should know better, it’s like my daughter is permanently tainted by these false accusations.
My daughter is PAINFULLY shy, while she will never initiate conversation with a grown up, she will always reply. No one has ever found her to be rude, she has always shown so much care towards her friends as she truly loves them and I am so worried all this will get too much for her and make her shyness worse when I am trying so hard to encourage her not to be.
Eg one child loses an expensive bracelet at a sleep over. My daughter had slept on one side to this child, another child on the other. My child accused of taking it (she’s never stolen before and she has a very similar bracelet that she wears everyday and has done FOR YEARS so where’s the logic that she wants another nearly identical one and would steal for it?) other child not even considered as the culprit. Lost bracelet child’s parents and sleepover parent both bombarding me with awful messages calling my child all sorts of names for about 4 days. They had all spoken to each other and decided my daughter must have taken it before even speaking to me. They involved their sport coach. Sport coach pulled my daughter up on it without even speaking to either of us- wtf?! Daughter now wants to quit the sport. They decided she was guilty and that was that.
Bracelet found in a different child’s sleeping bag almost a week later after it had been washed.
No apologies offered by the grown ups. Child found to have bracelet not reprimanded and all consider it to be some kind of hilarious accident.
Daughter so upset, the other children have all repaired their bridges with her (to be fair they didn’t really fall out in the first place, it was the parents) but my daughter never wants to go to their houses/parties/see the grown up at school events/social events/ever again. I completely support this but have said part of life is forgiveness and the whole thing says so much more about them than her. But I completely get how she feels.
There’s another of the kids parties coming up at the birthday child’s home and she doesn’t want to go. It’s her best friend. They have been best friends since preschool, they do everything together and people have even commented that they look so alike and are always together so they must be twins.
My daughter was invited to sleepover along with 2 others after the party. Then other parent text me to cancel that invite because she ‘doesn’t want to be rude but doesn’t want to deal with finding ‘lost’ property’ if my daughter attends.
I am so fuming!!!!!
Why are people like this??