DD touching sister's breasts

[Babygirl166]

My 3 year old DD was staying at my sister's house. My sister was getting dressed in the morning & my DD asked if she could feel her breasts. DD has felt my breasts on a number of occasions. My sister had no objection to this & allowed my DD to feel her breasts. What are your thoughts?

Really?

Aye, that's what I thought too. Seemed like really unnatural phrasing.

This is an odd post

Don't think our thoughts are necessary really.

"can I feel your breasts" certainly would be odd phrasing for a 3 year old.

Sorry if it sounds weird. This is what happened. I tried so sound as matter of fact as possible as I didn't want to create any bias, just wanted people's honest opinion on this.

Hi all,
This poster has been with us a fair while now, and English may not be her first language so we are inclined to let this one be for the moment.

Curiosity?

Yes curiosity on my DDs part. My question should have really been, should my sister have allowed this?

No. The 3yr old needs to start learning that bodies are private.

I think your sister probably should have said that we don’t touch each other’s private parts; I’d say that to my DD at 3 if she was asking that

I agree. She needs to learn boundaries. Have a word with both your sister and daughter. This should not be permitted

Thank you beans, pinky and user for providing some clear perspective.

Is she breastfed?
My 3yr old likes breasts. She will ask nanny or grandma or a close female adult. The response she gets is "sorry darling, my breasts don't work"
Asks for permission
Permission denied!

She's learning boundaries. I'd not worry about your sister but suggest to her that of your 3yo asks her again to say "thank you for asking so nicely but I'm putting them in my bra now so no.

I don’t think your daughter should be encouraged to feel anyone’s breasts. It is potentially leaving her vulnerable because the act of touching private areas is being normalised.

What you could do is introduce her to the NSPCCs cartoon character, Pantasaurous.

My kids asked to feel my breasts when they were toddlers. I think kids are naturally interested in breasts, maybe the soft, squidgy texture. I remember being about 5 and I used to love snuggling up to my mums friend who had very large breasts. They was something so cosy about it. My own mum was rather flat chested. Sorry if this sounds weird but there was nothing sexual about it!

My DS was breastfed to 2 with lots of skin to skin bonding.
He’s currently getting to grips with these kids of boundaries- and can be quite insistent.

On your DD’s account- It’s about being firm but kind “no darling, mummy doesn’t want to be touched there” “no we don’t touch people there- why don’t we have a cuddle instead?” etc etc

Your sister might be trying to be “right on” or permissive so as to normalise women’s bodies (why else would she do it?)- and i get that- but she needs to be told that instilling boundaries in children in this way is not only “okay” but hugely important as part of their socialisation, and told to follow your lead on setting those boundaries.

Thank you all

It's pretty normal, so I wouldn't worry about it.