Development Delays

[jasmine867]

Hi I'm reaching out as I'm extremely worried about my 32month old. Back at the end of October he had his 2 year review where the health visitor identified that my DS had a speech & cognitive delays. He didnt say mummy or daddy, doesn't really point, doesn't understand instructions lack of understanding. His only word was all gone, doesn't really make eye contact or respond to his name but hit and miss.

She recommended we check for glue ear and get his hearing checked long story short in my area it's a 26 week waiting list. Luckily I have private insurance so after a long mix up with my GP surgery not being clear it wasn't a pre existing condition it took me a further 4 weeks to sort out and he got seen at the beginning of December confirmed he had glue ear and surgery to fit grommets and remove adenoids on the 3rd Jan.

We've noticed a marked difference in him since he's had them fitted as he's now repeating words but ..... we have a speech therapist seeing him once a week but it's really about teaching us how to talk to him that's what it feels like in these sessions. We are meant to do things like hold back food and give him a bit at a time so he says "more strawberries" he doesn't say this just cries.

I've thought since he was 1 years old something was wrong but my HV just told me not to worry. My borough don't do 1 year checks but I can't help but feel helpless he's not getting any better he says a few bits here and there but we can't converse he can't tell me what he wants. He doesn't look or engage with me. I feel helpless and I'm terrified he's autistic.

Any advise how long does it take them to catch up

Hello,

My son is the same, he is now 3 y/o - he had all the things you mentioned, I noticed when he was only 2y/o - he knows quite a few words, says 2 or 3 words together but in general as you mentioned "doesn't really point, doesn't understand instructions lack of understanding,, doesn't really make eye contact or respond to his name but hit and miss " and doesn't communicate his needs mainly just repeating back what he hears.

He had auditory checks and results were all normal. A few months later, he was seen by a paediatric as my sons development was behind - similar to that of a 20 months old. They observed my son and we went through a list of development questionnaire, after an hour the Dr thinks my son may be on the autism spectrum - although he hasn't made a formal diagnosis as there is a process for this.

I am not assuming that your son's situation may be the same as my son, and you know him well but in my situation his nursery teacher flagged this up (although I already knew this myself) and since his school SENCO has been referring us to Speech & Language Therapy and she was the one who referred us to be seen by a paediatric especially for his development issues.

If your son is not already in nursery, you may want to consider enrolling him? You can see if it will help him with the social aspects and forming friendships (although I feel this didn't really help my son), however the school can be a great help in terms of referring you to services which can support you identify your son's circumstances. And if they think he may need extra support for his school aspect too, they will help you apply for EHCP (Educational Health Care Plan)so they are able to meet his needs and help him at school.

I completely understand your helplessness, and it is such a difficult situation to be in, especially when you are stuck in a limbo of not knowing what to do next. I wish you all the best with everything

PS: sorry for the very long reply

I have no idea if you can send messages on mn or not, but this was exactly the same as my lo and now has a diagnosis too. Message me if you can.

Have you looked at doing signing with him, for example Makaton. It might help reduce his frustration. In my experience signing can help speech as the child can use the sign to ask for something and you can then say the word very clearly back to them.

If you are concerned there is more to it than just a speech delay then I would push for a paediatrician referral.

Have you done the m-chat assessment online. It might give you some evidence to go to the GP with

I would also look at the 'talking point' website from the 'I can' charity. It has some really useful information for parents.

Hi thank you for the responses. My son has been going to a nursery since he was 6 months old. But we changed it 7 months ago as he wasn't progressing at the previous nursery. Since we've changed he's come on leaps and bounds but we feel he's still not where he needs to be. Speech therapist and nursey reports show he's around 12 months behind where he should be and they don't want to worry us at this stage as most people say wait and he will catch up.

I know I shouldn't compare children as each is different but all the children call me DS's mummy except my own child. Hard

Our speech therapist has recommended we try signing and flash cards. Little one just gets frustrated even more when we attempt it.

Their is a 12 month waiting list to see a paediatrician. I've spoken to my GP and she recommended we get him checked and has given me a referral I doubt my insurance will cover but either way I'll see if I can get him seen as I we need to know how to move forward to help him.

Hi OP, I’ve been in the same boat with my DS. His nursery recommended getting in the waiting list for a paediatric appointment as we also have a 12 month wait. It’s better to get your DS in the system now, wait for the appointment then if he still isn’t reaching his milestones you’ll be in a better position. We did that with our DS as he was behind in his speech and had a few other ‘quirks’. We waited a year, his speech improved massively and the doctor discharged us straight away after the first appointment.

Are there any specialist nurseries near you. Our local special school does 'stay and play' sessions for any local children and there is a local nursery that offers some specialist provision.

In some areas there is a portage service. This gives early intervention. I don't know how widely available it is but it was very popular.

Hi there is one specialist school but they don't have stay and play sessions. The GP has given me a referral so hopefully he can get seen in the next couple of weeks.

SALT have confirmed his speech therapy won't start until end of May earliest and that's group therapy.