Feel I should love being a mum more than I do..

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Name changed for this... Does anyone else find that parenting is really difficult sometimes.. and occasionally feel like they dont enjoy it... I dont know what I expected... I love my DS (hes 1.5) and he was much wanted.. but sometimes I do wish I had time alone like I used to... Today hes been in a horrible mood all day and I just feel rubbish. I know he cant help it but I just feel lost and alone.... to be fair hes normally quite an easy going child so I know hes probably teething or something today. I dont have others with children to spend time with.. i find myself looking forward to (not only today) going to work and counting down the minutes till nap time when we have a day off together. I feel so guilty I dont always enjoy spending time with him... I've been back at work around 6 months now and I just feel maybe I'm struggling slightly with the balance... deep down I feel guilty for having to work as the few friends that have children dont.. I feel awful typing this... I'm not even sure I know what I'm asking... does anyone else find the balance of working and being at home tricky or feel they dont enjoy their DC as much as they should do?

Everyone EVERYONE finds it hard at some point

Yep, EVERYDAY! I have 2 and it doesn't change as they get older! Any woman that says they don't feel the way you do for even a second in their life after becoming a mum.. they lie 🙄

Me! What you describe is very normal and many mums feel like this, and many mums will never be honest enough to tell you they feel like this. My 2 are a lot older than yours (8&7). They are exhausting. They want every minute of your time....both waking and sleeping. I have days when I just want to run away. I also have days when I want to burst with pride. I work 3 days a week and I think being a working mum is good for me, good for DH and good for DC (although my own DM tells me to stop on a regular basis). I’d be even more exhausted if I didn’t work. You are doing a great job. Your feelings are normal. If you could find some honest friends to talk this through with.

It’s really bloody hard. I have three, and have felt like that a few times over the past 6 years since my first. I find it generally much more enjoyable as they get older... I adore my 13 month old of course, but spending time with my rational, curious 6 year old is definitely easier!

This is reassuring to read... I feel sometimes like I'm just getting through
each day. I feel surrounded by people on facebook etc portraying this perfect family life when a lot of the time I feel being at work would be an easier option and a preferable one at times. I do have days where things are great.. but sometimes I do just long for my old life back.. thanks for sharing it helps knowing I'm not alone I
finding things tricky at times.

Completely normal: www.forgingfamilies.org.uk/inforgraphics-debunking-myths/

Yep!!! Work full time 2.5yr old- and that makes me feel like I should love and savour every minute I have with her in the evenings and weekend. But truthfully children are hard work. Today I had tears at breakfast, screaming at swimming, no nap and I literally wanted to get in my car and drive off for a couple of hrs!!! We’re human!

Social media has its place but it is all very false and those perfect families are very unlikely to be.
Having children is hard and there is no manual! The age of your little one is also difficult as you cant reason with them. Youre definitely not alone op and I'm sure you're doing a wonderful job.

OP I feel exactly the same as you most weekends, even more this weekend when we haven't been able to get out much as the weather hasn't been great, and I work full time with two DC, 3.5 and 1.5, love them to bits they are such hard work! The relentlessness really gets to me sometimes and I could never not work.

DH feels the same as me and we are honest with each other, we allow each other a couple of hours of child free time each weekend if we can.

Yes it is so so exhausting I love my DCs so much and as PP said there are days I'm bursting with pride and happiness and then there's days I'm crying and wanting to run away

I have finished my weekend with my 18mth old by crying my eyes out as soon as he went to bed. I work mon-thur so the very brief mornings and evenings with him are tough because he’s tired. I spend the whole week looking forward to the weekend so I can spend time with him.

However the last 6 weekends or so have been awful. He cries and whinges constantly, everything is a battle, and it breaks my heart. I can’t understand why he is so miserable.

Me and my husband are currently also trying for a second baby, and at times I can’t fathom why we are doing this when I can’t cope with the one I have.

And this is why I've chosen to stop at one child! He's just over 2 and although he is my entire world and I love the bones of him, being a mum is so much more relentless, exhausting, and tough than I thought it would be. Most days are just counting down the hours till bedtime then missing him as soon as he's in bed

I'm hoping it gets easier as he gets older and can communicate, do more activities etc.

I feel this. I also just find my DS just sooo annoying sometimes!! I obviously love him to bits and think he is the best. But oh my he is 2.5 and frustrates the hell out of me sometimes.

I've also got a 2 month old DD and yea just finding it Hard. I'm baffled though. I wanted these children so much but at the moment longing for the life I used to have and kinda wishing it away until they are older and more dependent. I know I'll miss it when they grow.

It's a head fuck tbh

I completly agree it's a head fuck. I work 4 days a week similar to PP. I feel I'm just wishing away time. I find myself thinking itll be so lovely when hes in school and he can tell me about his day and say what he wants for tea and pick what he wants to do at a weekend and not rely on me for everything. But then there's the guilt that you're wishing time away. I sympathise with you @lemonnhoney as I also would love another child one day but part of me thinks its so difficult why do it again.

All the time. And yet other people always tell me I have a really happy family life - news to me! I have three and in all honesty some days I wish I'd never got pregnant. The good news is that I found the first few years with my first far harder than anything since. I hadn't made any friends, I had no real idea how to entertain him and he wasn't really "company" because he didn't talk and it was all tantrums and stopping him killing himself. I went back to work after six months because I couldn't handle the loneliness. Also very hard getting used to the fear of anything ever happening to them. Six years in (I had three kids in 4.5 years) and my mental resilience is far better, although I am physically a total mess, lol!!

Oh god, completely normal! Please please remember social media is not real life. On one end of the scale, people like me use it as a snapshot of the happy times. On the other end, people lie, manipulate photos & pretend everything is perfect. It’s not real life.
I put up a post yesterday of a trip to a country park on Friday. Lovely photos of my girl splashing in puddles. What that post doesn’t show is the monumental effort & meltdown we had getting DD into the car, the laying on the carpark floor, face in mud because I manhandled her into her puddle suit, the fact she refused to walk in the same direction as the friends we met up with so I didn’t get to speak to anyone as I’d so looked forwards too nor the fact I paid for a nice lunch for us & she barely touched it. I got back in the car to drive home and felt beyond exhausted. Did I enjoy our morning & the walk, yes, I really did. My DD was very funny & cute. The bits inbetween were bloody awful.

I have Fridays off with my DD and I often wake up with a sense of oh god. A whole day to entertain her. I sometimes envy my OH dashing out to work. Some Fridays are fantastic. Some, I’m literally counting the seconds until my OH gets home! By Sunday, I’m very ready to get back to work & have a rest 😉

And honestly, I don’t know a single parent who doesn’t count the minutes until bedtime 😂 we are only human. Everyone needs some downtime & rest. Children are exhausting!

I love being a mum but I don’t love every single minute. In fact, some days, I could happily run away. But then tomorrow is always a new day!