Reported to Social Services - what next?

[Emmaloveslife]

Following on from my previous post - today I received a call to attend my son's preschool to speak with the manager.
She told me that my son's grandad had told her that I'm mis-treating my son by smacking him. (He receive a 1 off smack on the bum, nothing more). He's also told them I feed my son junk and he looks scruffy, unkempt etc. The manager immediately told me she refuted these last 2 claims as my son is CLEARLY well fed and well groomed, always clean etc.
I put the manager in the picture of the full story, also about his vile, and spiteful the grandad is. (I only allow him to see my son because he's ok with him).
Anyway, the manager explained she's have to call Social Services (duty of care, said they HAVE to do it) and explain the situation (but stressed she will also included everything I told her).
I'm told that they should have an update when I drop son at preschool tomorrow.
The manager said the most likely decision from Social Services will be to put me on an "EARLY HELP" plan - what is that?
She also explained it could involve me having to attend classes/courses. Will this be accommodated around my work? (I work 3 days per week). I'm willing to engage but just wondering if they do fit around people who have work/other commitments?

I would think a parenting course would be part of it.

Early Help is a 'step down' from Child in Need. So from a basic heirarchy point of view you have Child Protection, Child in Need, then Early Help. They cannot put your child on an Early Help plan. That has been worded incorrectly. Engagement with Early Help is voluntary. They may offer support through their Early Help team, but you can decide whether to accept it or not.

Please stop your ds seeing such a toxic man.
Trying to separate the poor kid from his dm isn't being a decent dgf is it?

Be very careful what you say to SS. I suggest you have a witness (your mum or best friend) with you at all times.

@busface999 has it ime. In our local authority EHPs are run by settings as no one else has the resources to run them.

Early help plans are sometimes called “CAF” it’s entirely voluntary. In fact you can refer yourself if you feel that you need support.

My two dc are on one as I needed help and support after several years of illness, my dc’s behaviour has become hard to manage.
They suggested courses I could go on, worked with the school and other support i had in place to find a plan that worked for my dc, including specialist groups for them to go to to meet other children with poorly parents etc.

Personally I would politely explain the situation, and explain that you don't as a rule smack your child, but explain the occasion for context. It is not illegal as such if its a light tap. I would not do parenting courses or engage in waste of time parenting training, unless I really felt it would help me. I would stop all contact with the grandfather. He has no legal right to see your DS and I would not have my child near him

Do not worry as hard as it is. A SS worker will come and do an initial chat. You should either record or have a witness though for your own piece of mind. We had a very malicious allegation made and had to go through this. Most traumatic experience. However after the first meeting it was seen to be malicious, and no further action was taken with the case closed. Early help would be the next stage if the case was not closed and they felt you needed some support. It probably will not even get to this. Be brave and strong. X

What drivel! I hope this is quickly resolved for you OP.

I work for SS, I don’t believe they will put you on an early help plan unless there have been allegations on multiple occasions. Chances are you may have a chat with someone from SS where you can explain the situation - the most important thing is to be completely honest. If nursery have no concerns about your parenting, they will probably just mark it as malicious and close the case.

Good luck

explain that you don't as a rule smack your child
Why should she have to? It’s perfectly legal to smack. Not saying I agree with it or do it myself, but it’s legal.

I imagine they will suggest you try different strategies to avoid smacking and suggest you reconsider contact with the grandad, then wish you well and close the case.

@DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult Assault?!?! Give your head a shake! One single smack on the bum is NOT assault! What a nasty passive aggressive person you are!!!!!

One single smack on the bum is NOT assault!

It is where I live, and rightly so.

I'm not being passive aggressive, or nasty, just factual.

If an adult got pissed off with you and gave you a smack, they would be charged, a child is far more vulnerable and needs more protection.

Regardless of this I doubt SS will do much about it. You do really need to stop contact with Grandad, this will only escalate.

@HavenDilemma no need to name call ffs. It’s a valid point. If I smacked a colleague on the bum it would be described as assault. The frequency is immaterial. You should not hit children.

OP you need to cut contact with the grandparent. It doesn’t matter how good he is with your son, he is ultimately detrimental to your family. Is this your father or your partners? Does he have a partner that would corroborate what you are saying?

I imagine they will give you strategies or possibly put you on a parenting course so you dont assault your son again.
The op has not assaulted her son, smacking is legal in England. Ss will do nothing.

The op has not assaulted her son, smacking is legal in England

The op hasn't said where she is.

Hitting a person is assault regardless of where you are though.

I doubt much will come of it, but it doesn't change the fact.