If you could recommend one parenting book for new parents..?

[CouldBeAGreatMum]

There are so many options out there and I know I could just ignore all advice but I am a book person and enjoy reading about things. If you could suggest one book on parenting / for new parents what would it be?

If it's relevant, I imagine that in terms of parenting style I will (try to) favour a mix of structure, routine and clear boundaries whilst also being a very 'attached' parent, using a sling etc, but not the full on "attachment parenting" and preferably not co-sleeping. I realise all of that might go out the window as soon as baby is born of course! And I understand the need to just be flexible. But just in case different books have clearly different approaches, this is where my head is at currently.

‘Your baby week by week’. Does what it says on the tin! We read one week at a time to correspond with DD’s age, so that way it didn’t feel like loads of information to take on at a time when you’re already sleep deprived

Lucy Atkins, First Time Parent. There is no advice on sleeping or whatever in it. Just practical stuff you need to know.

If you are breastfeeding and struggling with sleep I found the No Cry Sleep Solution helpful.

In terms of general parenting I would recommend the books by Janet Lansbury. I try to follow (as much as one can) her approach of having boundaries but also being responsive to the child.

Philippa Gregory -the book you wish your parents had read. It's phenomenal

The blissful baby expert! Short, easy to read chapters with practical advice.

Bringing Up baby by Daisy goodwin

It looks at parenting advice through the ages and also the social reasons behind the advice. It was very very interesting, least of all to put everything you hear in perspective.1930s parents were encourage to leave babies outside as it made them hardier - was linked to the country needing resilient soldiers of something, it's a decade since I read it. Gina Ford was all about routines because that's what working parents need. Spock was more hands on soft parenting to encourage women to stay at home with the babies and not go to work, leaving more jobs for men.
There were also some good tips in there too if I remember rightly.

Yes @TakeMeToYourLiar I've read that before - it's fantastic!

How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk

Also as a new mother the Chicken soup books are brilliant, very short stories of general parenting experiences that make you not feel quite so isolated.

@Cyborgfeminist thank you for your recommendation. it sounded good so I checked out the Amazon reviews... and then I saw this section from the book. I don't know how others feel but I was surprised at this advice being in a current book? Sounds more like something from the 1950's?? Sorry Cyborg if I've got that wrong.

The Science of Parenting - Margot Sunderland.

You can read whatever you want to, but just be critical of whatever you read and pick and choose what you want to. I am a pretty strict no nonsense parent and yet I would never do controlled crying. I sleep trained VERY gently over months so as to get good sleep habits as opposed to instant sleep solutions. I also breastfed. Son no 1 hated the sling. Son no 2 didn’t. But my parenting is as far from attachment parenting as it gets.

It’s about whatever balance suits you and your personality. I like routines and plans. So I made a routine for myself (rather than the baby, hard to do with breastfeeding). We don’t watch much or any TV at all- neither do the kids. It’s not some sanctimonious thing, it’s just not something we do (and I hate background noise- it sets my teeth on edge). My kids have been brought up mostly screen free as a consequence.

I am a very social person but my first son was very shy and anxious and hated big groups. So I adjusted my parenting to make him as comfortable as possible. As he got older I stretched his boundaries slowly. He’s still more shy than most boys his age but he has a good group of friends and is much better in social situations.

Within the limits of what is sensible (safe sleeping advice, general sensible medical stuff) you should feel free to adapt your parenting to who YOU are and to the child you are given. I didn’t use Gina Ford for instance but one of mine would have thrived under it and one would have hated it.

I loved "French Children Don't Throw Food"