Better to live near GP or where more is going on?

[Icecreamsoda99]

We currently live in a one bedroom flat in London with our newborn. Where we are there is lot going on for babies and young children all within walking distance (I don't drive which is not an issue at the moment and on street parking is hard to come by and extorianate).

We know we will need more space as she gets bigger, though we could potentially stay where we are and move bits around to make a second bedroom but it would be cramped, we could afford a two bedroom flat in the area (just) but no way to afford a house. The other option is to buy a house near my parents in the suburbs, longer commutes but near family and old friends (it's where I grew up) but looking on HOOP nothing closer than 3 miles away going on for children. I'd have to learn to drive which is fine, but would lose the social network we have here by moving but I suppose have a better support network. I know we're luck to be in this dilemma. Has anyone been in this situation and what did you do?

I realise by putting GP in the title it might look like I mean doctors, sorry!

Near family and old friends for sure!

Have you considered schools yet? I know it seems a long way away now, but it's worth looking into if you plan to stay in the new place for 5+ years.

Thanks @Mandarinfish Both areas have currently good schools, within walking distance so we would be okay there. I'm probably overthinking the activities, when I grew up there I was lonely as a child and teen but then my mum sent me to a school on the other side of town (religious one) so none of my friends were in walking distance, I wouldn't do that so my daughter's experience might be different.

I grew up in London and moved out when my DC1 was 18 months (although actually further away from my parents who still lived in London). I remember having the same thoughts that there would be less going on in the country but it's not the case at all. I've found it much easier to meet other mums. The thing is that some things (like my local baby and toddler group held in the village hall) may not have an internet presence.

Im a suburbs girl myself- still London, still loads to do. I personally think you need to drive and move nearer your support system.

I cannot tell you how much i want more space now I have a toddler. I have a small house and would kill for a play room- the amount of things kids have, I would go crazy in a small flat tbh. Having said that I wouldnt move anywhere that rural as I would struggle. Where abouts are you looking to move to?

I’m a C London girl myself but I’m finding it hard to imagine a suburb with nothing at all for children and babies.

I'd have a look on Facebook for activities - there's barely anything on Hoop where I live but it's actually really busy - we could go to multiple things a day if we wanted to.

Not a problem in London surely? You have good transport links. It's not like you live in a Yorkshire village with one bus a day.

It would depend on the suburbs really - I live in a london suburb and the air quality is almost as bad as marlebone road but there's lots of stuff to do with DC and schools are really good but its not massively cheaper..
even though transport is good i still drive more than ideal to/from activities eg time back from school to get to sports club and eat/homework in between but when DC younger a lot less I guess

I would love to be further in .. but once DC in school its harder to move so you dont have to decide yet.....but I wouldnt make a small 2 bed if it would cost a lot..

Definitely near GP and learn to drive. Hoop has a quarter of stuff that’s going on around me. It’s a different world outside of London and not all online.
Does your social network in London have kids? Friendships change when you have children.

If the grandparents are still fit and able to help out with childcare, even if it's just doing the odd school pick up, helping when kids are sick etc, then you will appreciate that so much, especially when you're no longer on maternity leave and you're being pulled in lots of directions. And I'd also go for the extra space, rather than trying to squeeze into your flat. I'm sure there will be more than enough going on in the area than you think when you get settled and start to develop more of a network.

Thank you all for the advice, it's the South East of London l, out towards Kent but not rural but cleaner air from where we live and taking that into consideration.

Stay where you are. Important to have stuff to do now and it will be much better when they’re older rather than having to drive everywhere.

If the grandparents will look after sick children, do school pick ups and drop off, holiday care etc move near them!
There is probably loads going on but its not posted online. You have to ask other mothers, at libraries, preschools, look on notice boards and you will begin to find out what activities are available.
Mumbler is another site things are posted on.

Not all the activities would be on HOOP - I've never even heard of it tbh yet managed a lot of things to do with ds when he was a baby

Icecreamsoda99 i live in south east london/ bromley boarder...lots to do and good transport. (I still would learn to drive).

Near me there are 5 parks within a 10min drive
We have large soft plays centres in: Beckenham, Orpington, Kidbrooke, Bromley
We have trampoline parks with toddler sessions at: Greenwich, Bluewater, Croydon
We have childrens cafes
We have all the usual baby group franchises
Plenty of church mother/baby groups
and a 20min train ride to central London

You will not be cut off from society

@OnlyFoolsnMothers thank you for the local info, that is good to hear, I'm probably comparing it to my childhood but was probably a lot less going on in the 80s!

Thank you all, food for thought all round but feeling more positive about a potential move even if we postpone for a year or so!

I would stay and save personally we dont know the impact brexit will have on the housing market as yet