4yo started gymnastics - doesn't like it

[RidingMyBike]

Signed 4yo DD up for a 12 week gymnastics class earlier this month. It was only option - they didn't offer a trial or PAYG etc. I thought she'd enjoy it. She loved the first session - galloped in, really threw herself into everything. I watched through a window by the door.

The second time (last week) she hadn't had a nap/quiet time in the afternoon and was tired and grumpy and didn't want to do it. I suggested she had a go, and she did for a bit very half-heartedly but eventually came out in tears, wanting to go in the soft play (also in leisure centre). I gave her options of going straight home or watching the rest of the class. She chose to watch, and then went in for last ten minutes and really enjoyed it again.

Now I'm not sure what to do. Class is at 4pm today. When I mentioned it earlier she said she didn't want to do it. She's about to have today's quiet time (she only naps 1-2 days a week now) so she shouldn't be tired like last week. I'm not sure whether to take her and see if she changes her mind, or whether to just write it off.

@Deadliestlampshade I've complained because what I was told to expect about the class and the reason I was happy to sign up for it wasn't the case in practice. It's especially important as they don't offer a trial session so the only way to see what it's like is to pay for a 12 week course.

I think you've learned a valuable lesson OP - a decent class or club will always offer a trial. Poor wee thing, I'm glad you got your tiger mum on and went to get her!

@swingchandelier thank you. I'm not concerned about the tiredness, she's gradually dropping the naps, and the naps do seem very dependent on what else she's been doing - a morning at toddler group and then walking round the shops doesn't tire her out, but last week we'd been to an exciting new place for four hours with a friend so she'd been very active. I've also noticed a difference as she switched to a forward facing seat when she turned four, which means she no longer has a cat nap in the car on the way home from things.

@LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett LOL tiger mum. I'm ever so meek and mild normally

What worries me as well is that they seemed to want parents to be well out of the way - I pointed out that if she came out wanting the loo I'd have to be there as she'd be out in a public area and, although she's been potty trained a year, she'd still need someone to go with her to the loo as they're in a public place as soon as they leave the room the class was in.

You’re making me feel like a slack mother OP, my 4 year old goes to both ballet and gymnastics and I don’t even stay in the building, I go home for the hour or to a cafe for a coffee! I’ve been dropping and running at ballet since she was 2.5

4 is still very small and not all 4 year olds are going to be able to manage that kind of structured activity. I know my DD really struggled at that age and got easily upset and anxious if she was somewhere new. You’re right to stop going. It’s a sunk cost now no point in forcing her to do something she’s miserable about.

You’re making me feel like a slack mother OP, my 4 year old goes to both ballet and gymnastics and I don’t even stay in the building, I go home for the hour or to a cafe for a coffee! I’ve been dropping and running at ballet since she was 2.5
All kids are different, some kids are naturally less anxious and can just be left to get on with it. I’m sure your DC is perfectly happy.

@Elbeagle TBH it didn't occur to me to ask about whether parents could leave the building during the class! We use the crèche at the same leisure centre too which is up to age 5 and have to sign a form saying we'll remain on site!

Heard back from the manager - the place sounds like a complete shambles. Apparently there's a 'parent behaviour policy' which means parents aren't allowed in to watch classes, but the front of house staff who handle the bookings hadn't been told about it(?!) so have been telling parents they could go in. So the coaches had reacted by blocking all the windows off (which management didn't know about but have now banned). Meanwhile, they haven't actually made the policy available on the website or elsewhere so no parents actually know about it.

The manager wants DD to try it for a few more weeks but I have zero confidence in the coaches after this week. Apparently after that he may consider a refund. But whilst looking for the parent policy on the website I found the cancellation policy which states that I am entitled to a pro-rats refund so have asked for that...

It's like a case study in poor communication!

Rats?! Rata!

Thank you for the support on here!

The manager has started an investigation into safeguarding and policies around parents on-site as he wasn't aware what the coaches were doing at the class. Meanwhile I've been given a full refund (which I wasn't expecting - it should have been two thirds under the cancellation policy!) and DD won't be going back.