Feeling sad about dd moving out

[sweetheart]

I'm not really sure my purpose for posting - probably for reasurance that this is all a totally normal part of being a parent and that I'm not being stupid.

Dd is moving out soon - not far, in the same town. I feel excited for her but also really sad at the same time, I will really miss having her around. She is moving in with her partner who I know the move is mostly driven by because she isn't very happy at home.

I haven't told Dd how sad I feel - mostly because my mother still likes to bring up that I broke her heart when I left home - and that was over 20 years ago now! I want her to feel excited about this new chapter in her life without my feelings tainting it.

I'm just sad I won't see her as much. I also feel sad for my ds who is going to miss her so much - they have always been so close.

She's not coming on holiday with us this year either so it will be just me and the boys. I've recently found at home being with 2 boys / men I sometimes feel outnumbered by them and miss other female company.

I know all this is stupid - it's a natural part of life and I should be pleased that I've raised a capable huiman being. I know that some of her friends went of to Uni a couple of years ago so I've had her for longer than some parents. She's always been such a homely girl so I guess I just assumed we'd have a bit longer with her before she ventured off into the world - slightly dramatic as she'll be living 5 mins down the road!

Sigh! Bit of a pointless post really isn't it!

My dd(19) is still at home and even though I would miss her if she moved out I think she's ready to. She wants things her way and this is our house (ie friends round after pub etc) and it's getting a little fractious. It's the end of a chapter I suppose; first day of school, riding a bike, walking to school by themselves they're all steps in the same direction.

Yes you are right about end of a chapter - I think I've just enjoyed life so much so far and I don't really want that to change. We are very lucky that dd is a good kid and we have never really had any fall outs with her.

for you OP. You’re definitely doing the right thing not letting her know how you feel. I moved out at 22 with my boyfriend of 6 years and my parents still guilted me into thinking it was way too soon I remember going to visit them (almost daily!) and being scared to tell them I was leaving because I’d always get a ‘oh are you not staying longer? back off again?’ comment. They meant well but I remember it making me feel as though I was doing something wrong at the time.

My parens are EXACTLY the same! The other day when I went round to see them my dad made a comment about "I'm suprised you aren't out with your 200 friends" which was obviously a dig that i don't see them enough. But the more things like that happen the less I want to see them. It's a very good example to me of how NOT to be with my kids. I don't want them to have years of guilt trips.