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Parenting

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Daughters noticed friends stammer

29 replies

Liveforfridays · 08/01/2020 18:42

Hi everyone. My DD is almost five. Her best friend at school a boy is the same age. We all spend alot of time together (his parents included) the last six months or so he's been tripping over his words sometimes. I figured it was just the excitement of having lots to say.

We've been with him alot this week after school especially. He is really struggling to talk. This morning he was saying each word in a sentence several times and struggling to start the sentence.

After school today. My DD came home today and asked me why James says and and and and. I I I I I and erm erm erm erm. I tried to change the subject.

Then she said she wants to do it too. I tried my best to explain he can't help it and it's not a good idea to copy it as you may end up not being able to talk properly anymore.

She has said a couple of things like it this evening. Any ideas how I nip this in the bud? I don't want her doing it Infront of him or getting herself in a habit.

I am not 100% sure if this is something he's going to grow out of. My friend did mention the teacher had asked her if he had had speech therapy but she said it more as thought he was saying the wrong letters like lello instead of yellow. That's not really my business anyway. I have noted it's got alot worse but I don't feel I should mention it to my friend. I'm just so worried my DD will mention it!

OP posts:
Mulledwineinajug · 09/01/2020 13:23

‘Might end up not being able to talk properly any more’ ???

Why didn’t you just tell your dd that her friend might find it upsetting if she copied him and that it isn’t kind? Not that he can’t talk properly and she might catch it too?!

I’d answer her question - Freddie sometimes struggles to say his words. And explain to her how she can help him as his friend - give him time, not interrupt him and not mimic him?

diydisaster · 09/01/2020 13:25

You need to explain in age appropriate language that sometimes he has problems getting his words out. Just the same as you would if your DD asked why someone was in a wheelchair etc.

Mulledwineinajug · 09/01/2020 13:27

If my child tried to copy a limp (which is a completely normal thing for a child to do, with no malice), I would tell her that it could be upsetting and not to do it. I wouldn’t tell her that she might end up not being able to walk ‘properly’

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speakball · 09/01/2020 13:32

Children learn by mimicking. They role play things they have seen which allows them to assimilate it into their mind map of the world. Shutting it down could say to her that there's something inherently dreadful about being or looking different. And then if they ever feel different to their peers this could cause them to worry that they themselves are 'wrong' I'm not at all saying this is in any way what you're storing up but its why the messages we transmit to our children are massively, massively important. For them and wider society.

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