Hello guys, happy New year! I'm new here and I'm looking for some advice. I'm 30 years old and I have a little boy who's almost 2. Me and my partner have been together for almost 3 years, we basically started dating and after a month I found out I was pregnant. It was very unexpected and shocking. I have to say, even though we have only met not long ago, I really enjoyed being with him and felt I was in love, just when you feel that special connection with someone. Now, i wasnt sure if he was feeling the same way and therefore when i found out i was pregnant I freaked out. I must mention too that I live in Ireland, very far away from home and I have no family here, so I was also concerned about having no support here. I didn't want to end up on my own with a baby in a foreign country far away from home. My partner was incredibly supportive when I told him I was pregnant and told me he felt the same way as I did, it was a huge relief. After this, he asked me to move in with him, to a different town where he's from and where his family lives, so we could have them close by to help us with the baby or whatever we need. Now this town is far from Dublin, which is where I was living and working , so commuting to work became hard, as in now I have to travel over an hour/hour and a half.
His family are very helpful and supportive, they are lovely people, I have to say I'm very lucky.
Being a parent has been exhausting, I miss sleeping, I miss being able to eat in peace, having a tidy place, having time for myself. After I became a mom I started working only twice a week to be with my son, i didnt want to leave him in a creche and miss all the lovely moments with him, so it was my decision to stop but now that he's old enough I feel I'm ready to leave him in a creche and I know it will be good for him to be around other kids. However now I feel frustrated with my work life, I'm bored of my job, doesnt fill me anymore, i want a job where i can learn more and feel more useful, also would like to find something closer to home. Like i said, my partner is very supportive and helps alot with our son but i feel in my case my life changed the most and i had to sacrifice more and im trying to build that part again. I have been feeling very overwhelmed for the past few months, I feel our lives are now all about our son and the couple side has been left behind. When we started dating everything was new and exciting but we had very little time to enjoy that, now I feel things are boring and I'm starting to question everything. I wasn't ready to start a family and settle down. My son makes me very happy and it's the best thing that have happened to me and I also feel lucky to have such a good partner who's also a great dad, but even having all this I feel confused, I sometimes miss my old life and feeling free. I don't know if I feel like this cuz I'm tired and overwhelmed ( my son is going thru the terrible twos and he's a handful ) I don't know if I can feel that spark we had again or if it's really gone, I don't know if feeling unhappy at work is making me see things even worse, I feel depressed at times.
Any of you feeling like this? Thank you for reading x