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My toddler hates me

2 replies

HGranger · 30/12/2019 10:08

I don't know what to do, but I'm absolutely devastated. My daughter has always been a daddy's girl, but the last few weeks have taken it to a new level. She literally wants nothing to do with me. She screams and hits if I come near her, saying 'away mummy'. She is always crying for somebody else, daddy, grandad, nanny. Will she let me near her, not a chance. I am just bereft. I feel like a complete failure of a mother. I have tried to be the best, caring, supportive, calm mother I could be, and I feel completely rejected.

I do work, but only three days a week, so I have two with her. I wouldn't be exaggerating when I say that the fight to go back to work part time after maternity leave near killed me. It left me with stress, pnd and anxiety and this time last year I was have serious suicidal thoughts, and I feel like it wasnt worth the effort because she hates being with me. My husband and I are going through a very bad patch, and I just feel like I destroy everything I touch, I must be a truly terrible person to deserve this.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Direwolfwrangler · 30/12/2019 10:19

I honestly could have written some of this. My 2 year old is an absolute Daddy’s girl at the moment and it has been incredibly difficult to manage. When it is just the two of us, things are ok but it’s like I vanish when my husband gets home. I have been an emotional wreck over Christmas, feeling like I have failed in some way. It has been hard on my relationship with my husband too, as I deal with the jealousy. He has been great to be fair and really makes sure I am included.

I don’t have much advice but wanted you to know you are not alone and my mum swears it will get better.

Hugsgalore · 30/12/2019 10:24

You are not a terrible person. My dd went through this at about the same age. Best advice I can give is to not let her see it hurts you. Just go along with it. "Oh, baby I know you want daddy but he's not here just let me help and daddy will be home soon. " she will eventually just come back to you herself. If she sees it's upsetting you though she will pick up on your stress and naturally be drawn to people who aren't stressed.

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