Christmas

[ThatNortherner]

My son is turning two in 3 months time, so this will be his second Christmas. Last year, he spent Christmas with both me and my wife (we’re separated, but not divorced yet). Since then, I’ve moved to London and moved in with my new girlfriend (me and the wife separated about a year before my son was born and I dated this girl then. Since then, I got back with my wife and we had our son. We’ve now split again and I’m back with the girl I was with during our break).

I want my son to spend Christmas with me this year, however my wife is adamant that he’s with her family over Christmas. We can’t even split it so he spends Christmas with one of us and Boxing Day with the other as she lives near Sheffield and I’m living in South London. His official address is in her house, however he spends a lot of time with me too. I’m a teacher so I usually have him over the school holidays, as well as random weeks during longer half terms.

Do I let her keep him for Christmas this year, or do fight my case? I know it is typical that kids spend Christmas with their mums, but why should I miss out on Christmas with my son. Also, we agreed that he spends school holidays with me, and it is the holiday.

Am I correct that your ex won't let you have your son to stay because you live with your girlfriend now? Have you had him to stay since moving to London and then in together ?

Could be the distance issue, could be playing happy families issue with new girlfriend. Sounds controlling.

I'm impressed you managed to change jobs so quickly, but not sure what you can do without a court order at the moment.

Man doesn't want to see child: attack
Man wants to see child: attack
Ridiculous.

If it means that much to you go spend christmas with him. Your ex wife has offered

My DS is about the same age and tbh is overwhelmed by Christmas - lights, music, bloody Santa appearing round every corner. I wouldn't want to have to put him through a 4-6 hour car journey on Boxing Day (when the traffic is always horrendous) away from the parent he spends the vast majority of his time with so I can understand why she's saying no. Has he stayed at your place before? When did you last see him? You mention the holidays/half term but what about weekends?

Agree with the advice from PP about getting access agreed via the court so you've got access for weekends, holidays and festive season sorted for future years.

He has stayed with me before on multiple occasions, the last time was during the October half term so about 2 months ago, but I've visited him on weekends since then, the last time being about 3 weeks ago.

Last night I spoke to my mum (who lives just outside of Sheffield) and she's said to my ex wife that she wants my son on Boxing Day. My ex wife has agreed to Boxing Day afternoon, so I'm going to go to see him then, with my girlfriend, but I'm not sure when I'll be able to see him after this who situation.

your wife has told you you are welcome to spend xmas with them both but your current lover is not but that’s not good enough for you?
billhader no parents have ‘rights’, they have ‘responsibilities’ legally, it’s children who have rights.