Gender Stereotypes

[SueBaroo]

I was wondering if anyone goes out of their way to negate gender stereotyping, or if you went with the more traditional ways of doing things?

Eurgh I hate it!

FIL says "ahhh baby GIRL" whenever DS whinges or cries which I really fucking hate and have mentioned so. DS also gets less cuddles from PIL than a female cousin of the same age which I find to be sad.

DS (2) loves dressing up in my shoes and walking around in them and his favourite toys are his microwave and little dolls buggy. He also likes cars and loud noises though.

Toys should just be toys, surely?

Though how can people change when shops still categorise toys by gender on the shelves?

I've always found boys and girls really into pushing stuff around, like buggies or trolleys. I have zero problem with the girls playing with baby dolls, as they've grown up they've always seen babies with me, so it's just a 'copy mama' sort of thing.
I wouldn't have a problem with ds wanting to play with them too, following after daddy.

But I'm perfectly content that I'm my girls role model, and Dh is the role model for ds.

just realised I am an hypocrite after all as I fully intent to ban Barbies and Bratz

Barbie has a boob job and Bratz well.... my friend was telling me they were ok because they were ethnically diverse, surely we can do better?

I've got used to dd and her dolls/dresses/jewellery but at first it made me uneasy - I suppose it just looks so stereotypical. My friends are all (almost) very gender neutral with their kids and their dds are not as 'girlie' as mine. For a moment I had to wonder whether this was really coming from her or from us - but it seems to be from her so that's OK.

No, I think it's very unhealthy not to let children live out their own gender preferences to the full.

Roll on tutus, pink, sparkly wands, Angelina Ballerina...

I don't want to ban anything. I hate pink sparkly stuff myself but equally, I was the girl that always had to dance the boy's part in country dancing club and I hated that
I am not relishing the thought of pink sparkliness but equally, I don't want her to end up feeling that she's any less pretty or attractive than other girls, and I think there would be a danger of that if I forced my preferences on her too much.

These remind me of some friends who banned everything pink as they don't wanted theyr girl to be forced to fit in the little princess role. Humhum, as soon as she was able to communicate better she demanded a pink dress!

DS has a buggy, I got it after I realised that the proverbial toy that caused so many discusions, bites and violence between the boyd was indeed a pushchair. He loved to take his train on it for a walk!

theyr???

BAnning pink/dolls etc for a girl is as bad as forcing them to play with only that.

Some girls only want pink and dolls. That's fine as long as it is their choice. Some boys might like only blue and cars/trains.

It's the forcing them in only one direction taht is the problem.

I don't think anyone's saying that girls who do only want pink/dolls are inferior, just that they should be allowed the choice.

Is there really so much choice/ How many boys can choose pink clothes and baby dolls?

A hundred years ago the colours were blue for girls and pink for boys. Peer pressure erodes choice - for parents as well as their children.

I remember a thread here years ago when mums of young boys agreed that given the choice, their children would happily choose a pink fluffy dress than blue trousers.

Apparently children don't know that their sex is permanent until about 3 years old. It's impossible not to be influenced by your parents and in turn to influence our kids. I have a son, and am ok with him having 'girly' toys, but I wouldn't buy him pink things (I hate the colour anyway).

ds has an eclectic mix of toys, his favourites being the train set, the baby doll and buggy, the tractor/trailer and the play cooker I am fairly conscious of the 'dangers' of gender stereotyping. We really have encountered very little gender stereotyping from others so far (although he does tend to get the car/train-type presents from relatives, and MIL did have a fit when I bought him the doll's buggy), but fully expect that to change when he hits kindergarten

I tried very hard with my older kids not to stereotype. All of them got cuddles from both me and DH. All of them got "oh splat! Up you get!" when they fell over. All of them tried karate and ballet and music lessons. I refused to dress DD in pink and she had few dresses. The boys I tried to dress in different colours- red, turquoise, purple, orange. They all had cars, lego and dolls, they all had books.

DD1 was never a dolly girl- just wasn't interested. She was more into action, and music. She has just graduated from Drama school.

DS1 was very interested in cars and factual information. He is studying to be a marine engineer.

DS2 is into reading in a big way- especially Tolkein and Garth Nix. He's also into computers and computer games.

DS3 was the most girly of all my children. He was always very interested in colours, textiles and so on as a little boy. He has a musical talent he rarely uses.

DD2 I've had a complete about turn. Everything she owns is pink! We shall see.

There's an article in this week's Economist explaining that female preference for red and pink is genetically, not culturally, determined. Very interesting