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bonding with 17 month old

2 replies

Babybop67 · 11/12/2019 22:16

I am a stay at home mum. Toddler goes to grandparents 1 day week since 3 months. I spend a lot of time with him on floor playing, park, singing, reading dancing every day. Always shown affection by kissing, trying to cuddle him. It has never been reciprocated. So just assumed its his personality. However last 4 month he is giving hugs to his father and grandparents, when I try I get pushed away. Recently its got to the point where when he wakes in the morning if its not his father he cries when he sees me. I honestly feel I have done a good job with him, im present and always given him my attention. When I pick him up from grandarents he doesnt even smile when he sees me. Im really confused and concerned that we have no bond. Where have I gone wrong? What can I do to make him like me? Is this normal for a child to not want to cuddle his mother, be excited to see her after a few hours?

When its just me and him at home he is fine happy and content, but there is no affection from him and pushes me away if I try to. When his father is playing with him, he goes up to him to hug without any encouragement.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Theorangeorange · 11/12/2019 22:50

You haven't gone wrong anywhere, it's because you're the safe place, the constant and they don't make an effort for us! I had it with my two at stages and it does change I promise- keep doing what you're doing Thanks
My youngest currently is super clingy-won't leave my side or acknowledge anyone else, that's hard too, but again just a little phase I'm sure.

SlB09 · 11/12/2019 22:58

My lb has just turned two and went through the same phase around your son's age, just wanted 'daddy'. Woke up in the morning and shouted for daddy, if I went in he would cry etc (my husband secretly loved this attention!) He's now gone the opposite and more often than not it changes day by day now. It'll come back around, as pp said you are his constant so he doesn't feel the need to express these emotions as he's secure enough in your relationship to know you won't be going anywhere fast no matter how he vahaves with you. Try and take it as a positive expression of his trust in you, easier said than done though!

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