Clinging and crying

[fernyburn]

Hi
this might seem that im worrying about nothing, so would love some advice.
My dd is 7 months, and is really clingy, she is my 1st and I know its a stage they go through but....
I have just returned from a music group for babies age ranges from 5 months to 1 year - my dd is the only one who doesnt seem to enjoy the group.
Every instrument she is given to shake goes in her mouth - and when I try to take it off her to play - she cries, its the same with nursery rhymes - the group plays with little birds and things - and if she isnt allowed to have them in her hands or mouth - she cries.
She doesnt want to sit and watch, but is always holding her arms out for me to hold her.
All the other babies laugh at the toys that their mums hold - mine just wants them she has 4 teeth coming through (already has 2) and is crawling, I am a SAHM and she has been a demanding baby from birth - needs entertaining constantly.
I know this sounds that Im complaining - but Im not - I absolutly adore her but Im just worried that she is getting too spoilt by constantly getting her own way and am storing up problems for the future. I dont see any other mums so im rather isolated - so this group I thought would be good for her and me.
Is there any advice or has anyone been through it.
Thanks

Hello,

my dd is 19 months now and she went through a clingy phase recently when she started one day at nursery, it is starting to wear off now. DD also attends a music group, when she first started going, she hated it but now she loves it. It just takes time for any child to get used to anything and life away from mummy even if she is in the same room! I don't know if there is much you can do apart from let it pass. Persevere it will get better

You could also try taking her to a play group which is less stressful if you dd starts crying. Out of interest where are you based?

Good luck

Sorry, Fernyb, not trying to be funny, but...
what kind of joining in did you expect? Singing? Clapping? Smiling pleasantly and sitting still? Your DD sounds totally normal for her age... they still love to gnaw on toys for a long time to come.

It's wonderful she wants lots of attention my eldest is like that. Much easier than my middle child who is quiet and doesn't get the point of socialising outside the family at all. Yes middle one was the easiest baby, but she's turning into the most difficult to manage child.

If your DD is a real high-stimulus threshold person she will socialise with lots of people as she grows up and learn quickly she doesn't get her own way with most of them.

Fernyb - don't suppose this was a jo jingles class was it!!? (See my thread running at the mo)
I've just come back from one with DS and he's exactly the same at 17 months!! They're ababies at the end of the day and whatever we try to do they will express what they're feeling not what we want them to!!

Hi
yes it was a jo jingles group - I dont expect her to join in or anything like that - shes only 7 months its just that everything we are given to play with - she wants - and cries like mad when she cant have it. Maybe im just being over sensitive, but being a 1st time mum, Im not sure if I should give in all the time

Maybe you could take your own rattle or whatever, so that if she has a sore mouth or just wants to chew it doesn't matter. My ds is 22m and still sometimes shoves the drum sticks in his mouth at music class!

It's really hard when your baby is clingy, ds has been very difficult like this so I completely know how you feel. Nowadays he's mostly a lot better, but still has bad days when he can't bear me to leave his sight. I tell myself over and over that he's not being naughty - just anxious, that it'a a phase that will pass (he won't want to sit on my lap all day when he's 14!) and that it means that we have a secure and loving attachment to each other. Sometimes this helps...

I'm sure your ds will get used to the music class and will start to enjoy it at some point. My ds did eventually!

Toddler groups can be a life saver too - your local library or health centre may have posters telling you where they are, or your local NCT branch may have coffee mornings or something.

Fernyb - my ds is 7 months old too and he is horribly clingy suddenly! If I put him down on the floor he lifts his arms up, whinges and wiggles his bottom to get me to pick him up - this is very unusual! He used to play happily for hours, and now suddenly its up up up! Apparently this is all linked to teething - isn't everything at this stage?! Don't worry - it will pass, and if it doesn't, I guess you just have to be tough on yourself and her and put her down and walk away for a short while and then make it longer and longer. Does she have a playpen where she can feel safe with all her toys? Might help her feel more secure!

Meeting other babies will definately help too in the long run.

Where are you based? I got to and organise groups of mothers to meet up every now and then so if you are near me you are more than welcome to go to some of them - up to you, just an idea as we all know how isolating it can be sometimes.