Overnight contact with dad starting soon

[Alittlebitfat25]

So, I'm new but would love some advice/reassurance please!
My DD didn't start having contact with her dad till she was 9 months old due to a long running history of domestic abuse. It began in a contact centre and he now has unsupervised every other week for 6 hours. This is going to be progressing to overnights in February when she is 18 months old and will be Saturday - Sunday every other week.

I just wandered if anyone had any tips on coping with this? I'm already freaking out at her being away from me overnight. It doesn't help that her dad lives 3 hours away so she will be a considerable distance. When she turns 2 years old he then wants to have her from Friday-Sunday every other week and I dread to think how I'm 'going to deal with that!

Make plans to keep yourself busy while she is away. Treat yourself to something special so you have something to look forward to. Don't feel guilty about enjoying the time alone. That's just unproductive and stupid.
Don’t punish yourself. You did what was best for everyone by splitting up. And, if the separation wasn't your decision, you had no choice.
Be flexible with your ex about schedule changes. Trust me, helping each other out is so good for your relationship with your ex. More importantly, it's good for your dd. As difficult as it can be, try to get on the same page regarding your child’s schedule to create some consistency for them. It may be an inconvenience for you at first, but it’s better for them.
She'll feel more comfortable staying at his with some familiar belongings around her. If there's something special at your home that you know she adores (like a butterfly night-light), see if you can find the same item for his home, or make sure it's in a "go bag" that travels with her from house to house. Talk to your ex about items that you can split between households.
Come up with a routine to help smooth the transition. You can plan the same favourite meal, read a book together, or play the same game.
Resist the urge to compete and try to muster some enthusiasm for her about staying with her father. You don't want her to feel guilty for enjoying her time there.
Focus on and enjoy the time you have when she is at home. Think about parents who have long work hours, or people who travel a lot for their jobs. They are really in the same boat. You might have less time with her, but you can make the time you have really fun and enjoyable.
Try not to worry. Even though he may not have been a good partner, it is still possible for him to be a good parent.