Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Child mantinence and anything else

9 replies

crazymumma10 · 09/11/2019 23:41

Just a quick question really to see if you would feel the way I do. Every month or so I have to ask my child's father for mantinence . If he sees me he will give me it fine ( if I ask ) but he will deliberately withhold it until I ask him. Also anything else that's DC needs. Say I told him something was broke ( something big and important that we would maybe go halves for every now and again very rarely ) he will reply generally like oh ok. Then if I hint about having to buy a new one he will say.. oh well anything I can do to help just ask me. ( knowing it's about money ) and then if I said anything else later on about him not offering to help he will go well you should have asked me then. He will never put his hand in his pocket of his own back. Would you say this is a empowerment thing? Its as if he likes me having to ask him. It's making me feel small. But it's his responsibility to help out and just do these things he's not 5.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
crazymumma10 · 10/11/2019 00:25

:)

OP posts:
Alsioma · 10/11/2019 01:00

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

crazymumma10 · 10/11/2019 15:02

Bump

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

WatchingFromTheWings · 10/11/2019 17:41

My exh used to make me ask for maintenance for the kids. Then he'd take up to a week to give it to me. He even asked if he could pay in instalments. 🤨

After the 5th month I told him he was to set up a direct debit for the 1st of the month so I didn't have to ask, or I'd involve CMS. Never had to ask again. It's all about control.

user1493413286 · 10/11/2019 17:46

It definitely sounds like it’s about control. Ask him to set up a standing order and if he doesn’t you’ll involve CSA.

user1493413286 · 10/11/2019 17:46

CMS even

IWorkAtTheCheescakeFactory · 10/11/2019 17:49

Right, text him now, telling him to set up a standing order to your bank account for the monthly amount to leave his account on the 1st of each month (so he will have definitely been paid by then). Tell him that it saves either of you having to remember to sort it. If he refuses tell him no problem, CMS can set one up for him (for a fee Wink)

As for other expenses, none of this hinting rubbish, as soon as you know something needs replaced you tell him “DC needs a new X, can you transfer £Y to my account now so I can purchase it, thanks”

SD1978 · 10/11/2019 18:13

Agree with others- request him to set up a standing order- or go through CSM. Of course he knows when it's due this is game playing control crap making you beg for it.

crazymumma10 · 11/11/2019 04:37

Thanks everyone. That's what I'll do :)

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.