Potty training with a boy, where do I start?

[MissPepper8]

I have the books, Potty training in one week and Potty training magic but I felt I'd get some real mum advice as I feel really daunted about this.

DS is 28 months, i've just bought him some proper pants (he chose some duggee ones), usually he wears pull ups (assume we'll use these at night). He's really good with his speech, excellent the last 3 weeks. Knows what potty is, sat on it (been in our livingroom for 4 months to familiarise him with it) and is good with sticker reward charts. He's told me he's pooed a few times or if I ask him are you going poo he'll say yes.

I don't know where to start though, I tried this say 3 months ago he did 3 wees that day on potty and the 3rd wee he freaked out crying as he'd peed in potty and thought he'd done something wrong, so I left it.

I plan on starting this weekend, he does nursery on Thursdays for a few hours I think he has a change or two there so that's a big worry.

Any advice is much appreciated, I think he's ready, he's more or less dry after morning naps. I'm just really scared about this, mainly wee part as poos you can kinda tell as he stops in his tracks or tells you.

The issue with going out too? Do I take another normal sized potty? Or should his potty goto nursery too (his ones bulky, it's the Step by Step potty, lifts off to turn into toilet seat ect).

With my DS we just took him to the toilet every hour or so. Lots of praise. He picked it up quickly. I did pants only at home (apart from nap and bedtime) and used pull ups on trips out for a couple of weeks until I got brave. I never had a travel potty, just took him to the nearest loo or a bush if outside.

Nursery should work with you and they will have child suitable toilet facilities. Ours were perfectly happy to take them hourly if we said they needed it. I just provided several spare outfits

We didn't bother with a potty for DS. We got a little step and went straight to the toilet. We made a game of it by popping a couple of Cheerios into the toilet bowl for him to aim at and gave him lots of praise every time. It took less than a week for him to be dry and in big boy pants

Ah ok, the potty we have turns into a step and the cushion he sits on comes off to pop on the loo, might try using that to see if using the toilets easier. He loves this padded thing as it's covered in animals so might help us (also lot easier to take places if I have to).

I don't know I just feel really nervous with this!

We used the book Oh Crap Potty Training, worked a treat on our 23 month old. She’s been fully day trained since then. The book gives a guide on how to proceed from day one & onwards! There’s also a great Facebook support group. It’s American so you get diapers & pee & daycare but otherwise a great read! It ended up being passed around my mum friends & they all used it with decent success too.

I plan on starting this weekend, he does nursery on Thursdays for a few hours I think he has a change or two there so that's a big worry

Nursery should be fine. In fact the peer effect should work for you. There’s always a few kids toilet training so ours would announce a toilet trip every hour or so and they would all want to go.

Mine hated potties so went straight to the toilet. Much easier.

DS is same age. We bought pants as he liked them and he's had a potty for ages. He has been telling us he has pooed for quite some time but he is absolutely adamant he isn't ready for pants (one wee through the one time he did try)

Average is 2.11 years apparently, according to person at our 2 year ish check last week. Nephew, they left it til 3 but then he clicked straight away.

I might try a bit more persuasion/ bribery at christmas when we're home together for a few days

I am very “slack mum” about potty training. I waited til mine said “I don’t want to wear nappies any more” then gave them pants and pointed them to the loo. They were later than some of their peers, but no stress and very few accidents.

I didn't do mine until 3 as he showed zero interest. I told him for a few weeks that he would be in big boy pants after visiting X relative. Then we stayed at home for a few days while getting the hang of it. He had loads of accidents the first day but after a few days he'd got it and never really had a problem since. I gave him a fruit shoot the first morning so I knew he would need a wee and then got him to sit on the potty until he weed (think I might have put the potty in front of the TV while waiting for him to go). Not sure if that is a recommended method but it seemed to work well! We used the potty and did the toilet later as he didn't seem keen on the toilet. Oh and sticker reward chart to get small presents eg car from charity shop. Bigger reward for poo. Make sure you have lots of spare pants and trousers. Also check your potty is easy to empty (try it with water) - I used the IKEA white and green one which was fine but relatives had ones which looked nice but were hard to pour into the toilet - not what you want! I would also say from lots of friends children that on average girls do seem to be ready earlier - I know lots of girls who took the initiative around 2 but most boys I know were about 3. I'm sure there are plenty of exceptions but I think this is an area where girls and boys are different on average.

Thanks for all the comments, really helpful 😊 One thing I'm worried about is if we do use the toilet straight away, him having an accident as it's upstairs so that's why I've thought potty downstairs (I'm also 20 weeks pregnant and he's a weight to run upstairs with haha) but this potty I have, has a seat you can use on the toilet so well see how he goes.

I'd love to wait so he can just click and get it, but we're in the UK, he has to be toilet trained for nursery/school which is next September (I think) and ideally in a perfect world this time would be perfect as I'm going to be all new baby by March and I'm afraid I won't have enough time to give him my full attention.

Don't get me wrong if it doesn't work I will leave it another month, I'm not going to push him. Thanks everyone again, really helpful.

I'd love to wait so he can just click and get it

By this I mean much later on, I dunno we'll see how he goes, he seems very interested in new pants and using big boy potty.

DS1 hated sitting on the potty for a wee, so I bought a frog urinal off eBay for a few quid it had a suction cup to put it on a cupboard/wall at the right height and he went with no problems. He would always sit on the toilet with a kids seat for his poo though.
He just wanted to wee like his dad I think

My little boy was 2.2 yrs when started. I went straight to pants as changing to pull ups confused him and he started waiting until I put some on for going out or naptime until he poo'd. It took a good 3 days and several accidents but I persevered as I knew he was ready as he was asking to go toilet and had dry days. We really struggled with pooing, he would panic and run away and he would poo in his pants everyday for about a week. I downloaded Pooland app and he watched it loads and got excited about pooing on the toilet to flush it away to Pooland!
We only have a toilet upstairs as well and to start I had a carry potty downstairs I would sit him on it whilst distracting him, this could be doing his shoes or picking a tv program and then Praise him. This potty was also handy when out and about although he preferred to go to a toilet and I rarely take it out now.
They all get there the main thing is the pick the right time for them. Good luck xx

@AndWhat That's an idea if he grows a bit fed up of potty. Fingers crossed really that I can just progress to the toilet. He had a wobble I guess 2 months back when I tried, I woke him up after nap, he had a huge wee on it and started to cry as I think he thought he'd done something wrong. That's why I left it.

@mummy2pickle I have the poo land app 😂 Yeah I feel if I leave him in pull ups he'll think there's no need to ask so I've got 14 pairs of pants coming. I think we'll go pull ups at night (my nan has suggested to take him before bed, and then wake him when we goto bed at 12) but he wees loads at night, his nappy is always heavy.

Separate day time conscious control from night time hormonal dryness. You can't train night time and it's perfectly reasonable to keep nappies at night

@Harrysmummy246 Yeah I don't think waking him will do anything but aggravate him so I think we'll scrap that idea and keep pull ups for night. He's not very good if you wake him, I think it'll just upset him.

Another fan of the 'wait until they are so ready they take their own nappy off and ask for pants' method here. Daughter was nearly 3 when we did it and she was dry in 24 hours day and night. Son is just turned 2 and hadn't even occurred to me to think about potty training yet, might get the little pink throne daughter used out of the loft and see if he shows any interest.

@BentleyBelly Tbh I haven't started, just been explaining to him and he seems to understand, he's quite excited. I'm just worried as new baby comes 4 months before he's 3 and he starts school 2 months after that.