Would you call this neglect?

[Didydani]

Hi guys,

So, my daughter comes to spend time with me of a daytime on a Mon and Thurs, as that's what we (me and her dad) agreed on.

(We've been through court and i dont want to go into too much detail.)

Anyway getting to the point. Each time she is dropped off, I've noticed that her nappy is usually still ^saturated and bulging (and i mean full to the brim!) with her pee.

This has happened on numerous occasions and her dad will even go as far as to me text me to tell me it needs changing, after he's dropped her off.

I'm guessing some of you will say that she could of filled her nappy during the car journey here but i think that's highly unlikely.

When I had overnight night contact with her when she was younger, her nappy would only fill up like this during the night and i would change her straight away, as soon as i realized in the morning. She doesn't fill her nappy all that much during the daytime, despite lots of water intake.

I've noticed that she developed a nappy rash from this and I've treated it, but I'm just so pissed off with her dad not showing her the least bit of dignity or respect, by changing her nappy as soon as she wakes up!

If it happens again today then I'm going to have a word with him!

If this is the only issue you have in terms of her personal care then I wouldn’t call it neglect. It’s not nice but he probably knows you will change her as soon as he drops her off. How old is she?

How long is the car journey?
Does she always have nappy rash or have you treated it once?

What time does she come to you in the mornings? Could he be putting her in the car while she's still sleeping?

If she's sleeping in the car it's not unreasonable to think that she could have filled her nappy.

He's probably trying to spend less on nappies. Why do you only have her for two days in week and not overnight though? Could you buy some extra nappies to send home?

Does she have bad nappy rash? If so, it could be a bigger problem that needs investigating. If not and she's generally clean then it's not worth getting upset about. Just make it your routine to have a clean nappy waiting.
Could it be an effort to get you to do a little bit more/financially contribute a bit more?

Need some basic facts!

How old is she

When does she leave her dad's in the morning

How long is the journey

Sorry, just re read and seen that she dies have nappy rash. Maybe sit down and have a chat about how you can both tackle this, rather than be confrontational? If I had a child most of the time (including every night) and the other parent started criticising my parenting, I'd respond negatively so tread carefully and go for an amicable solution.

Aargh does not dies!