Toddler refusing to listen to us

[Biancadelrioisback]

I know it's called the terrible twos for a reason and all that but I'm at my wit's end.
DS (3 in December) just won't listen. He's a lovely child, says please and thank you, very smiley and happy, always chatting to people and just really endearing. When he is with his grandparents or at nursery, they all tell me how well behaved he is etc but at home he absolutely will not listen. I ask him not to do something and it's like I'm speaking a different language. If/when I repeat myself, I get down to his level and try to make eye contact to tell him to stop but he refuses to look me in the eye and giggles in my face. When Ive had to tell him off, he laughs in my face and runs away.
The naughty corner only works somewhat. He'll sit nicely for 2 mins then we do apology and cuddle (I always explain why he's on there and make him say sorry for xxxx) but then he'll do the same thing again a moment later. He's started kicking and stomping when we tell him no, and it's usually me who gets kicked. This is usually at the end of the day and only at home and never around other people (other than DH). We discipline the same, have each others back, if one says no, we back each other up, yet I seem to be the target.
I need some new ideas how to break this habit and how to stop this behaviour.
He's my first and only child, and tbf, before we had him, I had never been around children before, so I'm learning on the job.
Any advice would be hugely appreciated.

At this age they’ve got pretty much no impulse control, so even if he understands that he shouldn’t do something it’s really hard for him not to do it.
If the unwelcome behaviour usually comes at the end of the day it’s almost certainly because he’s tired/overtired, my LG is much more likely to lose the plot in the evenings so I have to try to adjust my expectations and make allowances.
Maybe he’s not responding to ‘No’ as it’s lost impact? Try telling him what you would like him to do instead of what you don’t want him to do.
I personally don’t believe ‘naughty steps ‘ are effective particularly at such a young age.

I've heard mixed things about naughty step but I just feel like pulling my hair out some of the time.
Good idea about telling him what to do rather than what not to do, will give that a try.
I know it's tiredness related but I've got actual bruises on my skin not from him kicking me or hitting me with things.

Have you tried turning your ears off?! No,not sarcasm .....
I used to ignore mine. Didn’t see any naughtiness, and when he asked for something afterwards, my ears wouldn’t work!

Only took a few time s for him to realise, and in fact he told his younger sister that she has to behave or mummy’s ears don’t work when you’re hungry.......at the MILs of course!😮🙄

A lot of toddler behaviour stems from wanting more control. I try to give choices but often both lead to what I want to happen! . For example if it’s bedtime I would say let’s go upstairs. If I get a no, I rephrase - it’s time to go upstairs, would you like to walk or would you like Daddy to carry you?
Kicking/hitting - could try having a pillow or cushion and show him how to hit that instead of you if he’s feeling cross?
Toddlers are bloody hard work 😓