Terrible two's. Somebody, help!

[Sparrowlegs248]

Ds2 is 2. A few months away from 3. He was a really easy baby, very forward, speech is excellent. He's funny, and loving. But Jesus he's got a temper. I am at a loss was to how to handle the tantrums. This morning, he and dc1 were watching a DVD while I got ready to go out, tidied up etc. I went into the room and said "cone on then, time to get dressed" (if pre warned a couple if times, I'm doing this then we'll get you dressed) He immediately shouted "not me! No!" And then started having a tantrum. Crying and screaming and jumping about. Kicking , wriggling, generally being impossible to dress.

Today, it didn't matter, I'm off work and we didn't HAVE to be anywhere. But sone days we have to be out of the house promptly.

This is just 1 example, didn't want to leave a family members house earlier. Screamed for 10 minutes in the car.

Any words of wisdom? Dc1 was not like this at ALL. it drives me mad, and I get really (inwardly) annoyed with it. This morning I wrestled him into half his clothes then told him to go and sit on the step until he's calmed down. He did, and cane back a minute later and got dressed, in the meantime, I'd got really annoyed and frustrated. There's absolutely no reasoning with him so talking through it doesn't help.

I feel bad, as I see all these things about how we should let our children cry, not be afraid to show their emotions etc when all I think think is STOP bloody screaming.

My DD2 is like this. She's 2.5 and great in so many ways but her temper is really something. I've taken to just calmly ignoring when she loses it over something that has to be done, like getting changed. If that means I wrestle her into clothes and half-drag her out of the house, then so be it. She usually calms down in 5-10 minutes, and then we have a hug and talk about what happened. She's getting quite good at identifying how she was feeling (angry, sad, annoyed etc) and what triggered it, but she's also getting better at listening to why we had to keep doing the thing she didn't want to do, even though she felt that way.

I feel like we are slowly getting there, and she will now occasionally take a few breaths and calm herself down after screaming at her sister over something, so that she can come and tell me about it. Hopefully this will translate to issues she has with me soon, too!

My DC3 was like this - I think sometimes the younger one is more likely to be dragged places they don't want to go whereas you were maybe more likely to structure your day around your eldest.

Calm and firm is the way forward. Try not to let it wind you up - easier said than done I know!

Literally nothing I do makes a difference. I can offer cuddles, he'll either scream, or have a cuddle. Once he's calm, I'll explain what were doing and he'll start again.

I guess I need a way to not get pissed off with it.